Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
This is what happens when one confuses "random" with "profound."

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Voice

Currently wallowing in a somewhat shallower pool of cortisol and self-pity.

[Nov 28 2005, last modified Aug 28 2023]		    
(+5) 1 hour of programming cost index
(+3, -1) 100 million year project II
(+3) 3-D chess
(+4, -9)(+4, -9) A book I can read that tells me what to do.
(+4) A cacophony of lies
(+2) A fresh start
(+3, -1) A home for those without
(+6) A lab full of jerks
(+2) A method for sneaking guaranteed basic income in through the back door
 A patter of rain
(+3) A rainy day
(+3) A simulverse test
(+3) Active defense resistant cluster missile
(+4) active fall protection for laptops
(+7) Actively cooled bread-working surface
(+8, -1) Advanced math symbol refrigerator magnets
 AI-Enabled Automatic Hat Tipping Parrot
(+4, -1) AI greeter
(+1, -3) AI-made porn plots
(+2) AI recipe generator app II
(+3) Airbase convoy
(+3) airjohn
(+6) Airplane lifting hot air balloon
(+4) All-seeing monocle of fashion
(+10, -2)(+10, -2) Almost a Gambling gym
 almost telepathy
(+1) alternative artificial heart placement
(+2) Anarchosymphony
 Another ergonomic mouse
(+2, -5) anti-bacterial marble countertops
(+2) Anti-bear claymore girdle
(+1) Anti-bear skin cream
(+9)(+9) Anti bear sombrero
(+4) Anti-bear sombrero V
(+1, -2) Anti-Entropic Energy Binding
(+5, -27)(+5, -27)(+5, -27) anti-gravity custard-filled, genetically engineered perpetual motion device
(+7, -3) Anti-intimidation training
(-1) Anti robot drone
(+4, -7) Ants
(+2) Any Card lock
(+1) Anyway Transportation Company
(-1) AR ad-block
 Arm straw
(+5, -1) Artificial volcano cremation
(+6, -2) Ass hat Angel hat
(+2) AutoDefamator
(+3) Automatic counterweight for washing machines
(+4) Automatic cup lid
(+4) Automatic scambaiting
(+3, -1) autonomous multi-celled butt washer
(+5, -1) Autotrainer
(+1) Autoweeebile III
(+3) axe bow
(+7) Baby delivery by stork
(+1) Baby sensors for large appliances
(+3) Back Bumper Bulwark
(+2, -6) Bacon balls
(+2, -4) Bacon Scroll
(+8, -1) Baking for our grandchildren
(+1, -3) Balloon Display
(+1, -3) Balls of steel
(-4) base-emitting artificial tooth
(-1) battle planner for Eve Online
(-5)(-5) Be a prophet, guaranteed!
 Be able to see your toes in just one year!
 Benchmark Blinkenlights
(-4) Better Spam
(-5)(-5) Bicycle prop
(+2, -3) big bloody looking bandages
(+9, -2) big desert rolling pin
(+3) Bikini babes for accident scenes
(+6) Biofilth
(+8, -1) Birdbanking
(+1, -3) Black hole gun
(+3, -1) Blacklisting Browser II
 Blatantly Idiotic Predictions for 3014
(+3) Blight
(-1) Boat Shoes 2
 Boat shoes 3
(+4) bombastick
 Bondage practice doll
 Boob friendly video compression layer
(-1) Boozy kisses
(+7, -1) bore blocker
(+1, -2) Bounced signal time capsule
(-5)(-5) Bouncy Golf Balls 2
(+3) Boycott this!
(+1, -3) Brain scrambler
(+1) Brainwave
(+7, -4) break up a black hole
(+4) Breakfast Convoy
(+1) Bubble zapper
(+8, -1) Bucket O' Links
(+24)(+24)(+24) Buffer me long and hard
(+3, -8)(+3, -8) Bullet catching missile
(+3, -5) Bun Average
(+11, -2)(+11, -2) Burrito Banding
(+4, -1) butterfly wings for airplanes
(-1) Buy me!
(-1) Buy the "peace" from Russia
(-1) Buzzkeeper
(+4) Calciballs
(+6, -2) Call Mom every week
(+4) Candle alarm clock
 candy and cereal
(+6) car eyebrows
(+1, -4) Carbon fixed house
(+3, -1) carrier shell
(+2, -1) Casimir Drive
 cat's umbrella
(+3, -5) Cat scent
 Cell phone black box
 Cellam
 Centrifugal Diaper 2
(-1) Charity Work gift certificate
(+1) Chi/Chim/Chem/Cheir
(+1, -2) Chihuahuacroquet 2
(+1) Childrens bank
(+3) Chipped ice cream
(+3, -1) Chocolate and nuts mixer
 Cigar Ninjas
 city disaster insurance
(+2, -3) City-wide sprinklers
 Civilization V: Torches and Pitchforks
(+2) Claws
(+3) Cleaning mode for computers
 clip-on jammer
(+4) Clock maker
(+6, -4) Clubs for teens
(+2, -1) Codephrase helps stop prison rape
(+2) coffee bot
(+3) Coffee Whacker II
(+1) Cold beer, fast!
(+3) collaborative gigapixel camera
(+1) Collaborative journal by the public
(+2) color checker
(+1, -2) Common command cache
(+1, -8)(+1, -8) Complete car recycling
(+8, -1) Compliments that sound like insults
(-2) Computer-Brain Interface Protocol
(+4, -1) Computer generated languages
(+2, -1) Computer Nerd Radio
(+3) Computing with pressure
(-1) Context feeder for language disambiguation
(+4) Continental Plate
(+1, -4) Conventional ICBM
(+2) cookable clothing
(-2) Cooking with human eggs
(+1, -3) Cooking with man made gas
(-1) Covid flicking finger II
(+1, -2) Crashed program memory dump
(+6) Crayon printer
(+1) Credit balancing service
 Crime preventing panic button
(+5, -1) crime scene
(+5, -3) Crunchy Muahahas
(+3, -13)(+3, -13) Cult of the Hamburger
(+3) cup size coffee maker
 Custard Rims
(+7) Customer decoy
(+1) Daily stock reports
(+2, -1) data over modem for smart phones
(+1, -3) death lottery bomb
(+4) deck-of-cards armor
(+2) Differential magnet lock
(+6) Disaster kit in a (big) box
(+2) disaster search public assistance cameras
(+2) displaced air mouse trap
(+3, -2) Disposabowl
(+15, -1)(+15, -1) Distributed brake graffiti
(+19, -1)(+19, -1) DIY repair shop
 Do not enforce patent addendum
(+5, -2) Do not push this button
 Dontinterruptmedamnit amplifier
(-1) Double vote for link markings for old ideas
(+5) Dr. Hanson
(+1) Drain Yellowstone caldera
(+2) Dramatize all the things!
(+1) Dream Scratcher III
(+4) Drive bay printer
 Driving Straw
 E-Z Barf
 easier unstripping tool
(+5, -4) Easy bust-out shirt
(+4, -3) Eat this, you fat slob
(+3) egg cooking carton
(+4) Electromagnetic aircraft braking
 Elevated microwave oven platform
 Elongated sphereoid overlay for aircraft
(+3, -1) Encoded nova
(+4, -2) Entropic HalfBakery
(+4) ET in vacation photos II
(+4, -1) Eve we can dream it
(+4) evil bed
(+3, -1) Evolution in a box
(+3) Exercise Is For The Birds II
(+3) Exercise is for the birds III
 Extensible human
(+8, -7) External combustion aircraft engine
(+5) extra extra extra large paper towel
(+1) Extra, extra long kinetic energy penetrator rounds
(-8)(-8) Fake an alien invasion
 Fake cockpit
(+3) Fake Fake Suicide Bombings
(+3, -1) fake money wallet
(+1) Fake World War III
(+3) Fallout AI
 Faraday cage for tanks
(+1) Farmer Tan Eradication Clothes
(+2) Fart-b-gone
(+1) Fidget game
 Fight club
(+3) Fine-grained warrant canaries
 Finger putt-putt
(+3, -1) Fire Alarm II
(+3) First Class Travel room
 Fishing caddy
(+2) Flag Oneupsman Minus One
 Floor mower
(+5, -1) Fluffaway
(+1) Fluffaway II
(+2, -1) Foam squirter
(+4, -1) Fonts for dyslexics II
(+1, -2) forest harvester
(+1) Forgotten prenup
(+4) Free hugs!
(+2, -1) Frog-in-the-water brainwashing
(+4) From Go to Politician in one easy step!
(+4, -1) fruit of the poisoned tree research review
(+1) Fuel Drones
 Fuller bakery
(+2) Fully self-driving cars with today's technology
(+18, -3)(+18, -3) Garbageland
(+3) Gas fireplace with moving logs
 General AI development process
(+2) Generic Human Project
(+1) Genetic Gastronomy
(+5) GI bill for undergrads
(+1, -2) giant heavy hot air balloon for containing radioactive steam
(+4, -1) Giant letters identify fronts
(+3) Giant olives
(-1) Giant shotgun clears landmines
(+1) Gift certificates by the penny
(-1) Gimp mask of +1 snoozing
(+1) Golf ball dimples for vertical, lift style, windmills
(+4) Google Instamaps
(+1) Gothic blood clinic
(+1) Grafit-a-spam
 Grand Unified Dependency Checker
(+2) Graph ideas by date
(+6) Grave wyrms
(+4) Graveyard orbit for people
(+1) Gunfire-activated electromagnet
(+2) Gunfire activated light
(+6, -5) Guns for Zebras
(+2, -8)(+2, -8) guy that looks poor
(+2, -11)(+2, -11) Half Bakery Nutritional Supplement
(+2) Halloween vampire shaped bat house
(+2) Hamster Drone
 Handheld Mirror Airbag
(-1) Hardcore Beef racks
(-7)(-7) hardpoint mounted paratrooper
(+4) harness chair
(+2, -4) Hat over the Fence 2
(+1, -3) Hat over the Fence 3
(-1) Hat over the Fence 4
(+2, -1) Hat over the Fence 5
(+1, -3) HB Madlib
(+1, -2) Headers for scientific papers
(+4) Heads up
(+3) heat exchange alarm clock
(+4) heat-sink ice tray
 Helisubtruck
(+2) Herokillis
 Hide all youtube videos with titles that start with numbers
(+2, -1) High voltage, low current base plate around bottom of toilet
(+2) Higher on the sides
 Higher on the sides II
(+5) Highly Adaptive Phased Array
(+4, -2) Hillary Clinton knife block
(+3) Hinged steel notes
(+1) Hired crowds
(+8)(+8) Hold my beer
(+3, -2) Homeopathic Sleeping Clinic
(+4, -3) Honest Job collection agency
(+1) Hot butter knife II
(+2, -1) House smotherer
(+2) Hoverchair
(+2) Hovercraft in space
(+3) How I learned to stop worrying and love Skynet
(+1) How to help your human
(+10)(+10) hugging booths
 humans are your god
(+1, -7)(+1, -7) Hummer Holding
(+2, -3) Hurl hose
(+13)(+13) Hurricane coffee table
(+3) Hydrogen cigar lighter
(+4) Hysteria for the greater good.
(+3) I can dodge bullets!
(+7) I live with a troll
(+2) I love my job!
(+6) I'm from the government, and I'm here to help!
 I'm not being sarcastic
(+1) Ice chess
(+2) Image enhancement by OCR and image recognition
 immune system paleontology
(+2) inebriated monkey category
(+2) Inefficient Design
(+5) Infinifry
(+4, -1) Information Density based video speed selection
(+2, -1) information storage +1
 Instacool
(+2) Instructional videos for robots
(+2, -1) IR distortion field
(+5, -3) Japan geek tour
(+2) Jerks for Charity
 Jet enabled Dyson sphere
(+2) Just 15 more minutes
(+1) Just try it
(+7, -2) kama sutra crackers
(-2) Keeper of secrets
(+2, -1) keratin implants
(-1) kill switch
 Kim Jong Wack-a-mole
(+1) kitchen jigsaw
(+7) kitchen telemanipulator
(+2) Laser bolts that you can see
(+2, -1) Leercounter
 legalize attempted bribery
(+2) Lemon bot
 little livers everywhere
(+5, -1) Living trophy
(+5) Look for neutrinos coming from black holes
(+2) Lotterator 9000
 Love, Sex or Violence workout
 low level sound hearer
(+3) Luxuroom
(+3) Magaboomvroom
(+6, -5) Magazine lock
(+1) magnetic lottery manipulation
(+7) magneto-nuclear asteroid steering
(+1) Mahjong flash cards
 Make mine dippable
(+20, -9)(+20, -9) Man Mall
(+1, -2) Marathon pit stop.
(+2) Marko! Polo! Marko! Bang
 Martian Studies
(+6, -1) masochistic computing companion
(+10, -1)(+10, -1) Massive, complicated control panel
 Massively Distributed Strong AI
(+6) Mattresses as emergency floatation devices
 Mechanical Shoulder Parrot
 Medical training for all
(+1) Melting ornaments
(+2) Membership car wash that follows the member II
(+2) Merry Christmas to me
(+5, -2) Metachess
(+3) Micro-ISP
 Microwave food stirring
 mini galaxy
(+5, -4) Mirror snails
(+1) Mirrored cat hats
(+2) Mist toilet 2
(+3) mite-killing bed
(+1, -2) Modularity! The vehicle.
(+1) More evasive torpedo
(+4) Mosqiotobait 2
(+4) mosquito seeking missile
(+2) Mosquitobait
(+2, -1) Mount Eversatz
(+5, -1) Move Seoul
(+1) moving fuzzies for baby incubators
(+2) Moving target urinal
(-2) multi-headed pen
(+5, -1) Murder and rapine
(+4) Mutual leash
 myburnerphone.com
(+6) Mystical Laser Candle Lighter
 Nailinator
(+1) National Honesty Index
(+21, -1)(+21, -1)(+21, -1) naughty burka
(+2) Neck stretcher
(+2, -1) NeuroVerse
(+3) Nevermiss urinal
(+3, -2) nightmare preventer
(+3) NIST Standard Idiot
(+1) No diploma? No problem!
(+4) No listicles
(+3) No, really: don't take this with alcohol!
(+1) Nobel Lies
(-5)(-5) Non-bumping anno
(+1, -4) North Korea food offensive
 Not a bus
(+3) Not About You
(+1) Now that's a GOOD cup of coffee
(+2, -1) nuclear melt-down heat sink
(+4, -3) obscene X-ray goggles
(+17, -1)(+17, -1) Octostove
(+3) Odd shapes video series
(+2) Office Trains
(-2) Old-fashioned Cheese and Weasel
(+1) Open Heart
(+2) Open source city-wide anonymous autonomous robust vehicle control mechanism
(+1) Outhouse on a rope
 Ow, right in the verticle stabilizer!
(+5) Pachydermic Piano
(-4) Pain of living in the wild index
(+6) Paint artillery
 Paint Bomb 2
(+8, -1) Paintball Snipers, Inc
(+4, -1) Palmtop copier
 panicked pounding boss key
(+14)(+14) Paperclips for the wealthy
(+1) Paperclips for the wealthy II
(+4) Parachutes! IN SPAAAAAAACE!
 Party like it's 1699
 pass phrase search space reducer
 Passenger protection ponchos
(+2) People protecting pond poker
(+7, -1) Permaspin house
(+6, -1) personal sock maker
(+2) Personal storage tattoo
(+6) Philae: the movie
(+1, -3) Philosophical standing patch
 Phone and bandwidth backed currency
(+2) piercings for G support
 Pinball skating rink
(+1, -4) planned-crisis motivation
(+2) Plate packing protector projecting flower power podium
(+2) play-by-mail tennis II
 polyhedral crystal display
 pooled responsibility sperm donation
(+6, -1) poop hardener
 Poop recipe book II
(+5) prehistoric restaurant
(+2, -3) ProfessionalBeggar.com
(+6) Psychological targets
 Psychological targets II
(+6, -1) Public Dishwashers II
(-2) Push toilet
(+1, -5) Put a big bucket of liquid Nitrogen in race cars
(+4) Put schools in all guns
(+3) Put this butt in your nest
(-1) quantified entity specific information content
(+2) Quasirandom churn provides plausible deniability of piracy
 Quick-swap windshield
(+1) Quicker winter dipper stripper
(+2) Random factor result hider
 rapid natural selection for human safety
(+2) readtome.org
(+3, -2) Really big news alert
(+3) Realspace Object Library
(+5, -1) Recycled Buildings
(+2, -1) red-yellow-green light for doors
(+6, -2) Remit human rights for nonhuman agents created to manipulate people
 Requiem For A Dream Theminator
(+1) rescue caches
(+6) Reshapeable Windows 2
(+2) Resonance based explosive timing
(+8)(+8) Rick roll jammer II
(+4) ring of +1 dexterity
(+12)(+12) Rise and 'shine
(+1) Robotennis
(+1) Robotic arm patches tanks
(+2) Rollaboat
 Sale of indulgences II
 Salty wing
(-1) Save it for Later II
(+4) Schrodinger's Education
(+2) Scrolling wallpaper
(+1) Security ballot paper
(+2) See through the clamor of battle
(+11, -2)(+11, -2) seed bullet
(+2) Segmented coffee cartridge
(+3) self agitating cup
(+1) Self-cleaning carpet II
 self cleaning surface
 self cleaning toilet
(+1) Sell only a private, small-group viewiing license
(+3) Seoul Nearest Available Shelter App
(+3) Sex doll and phone sex worker integration for VR environments
(+1) sex up history
(+4) Shantytown, USA
(+5, -1) Shirt accessories
(+9)(+9) shock coffin
(-2) shock fishing
 Signed invention file
(+2) Sink of +1 laziness
 smart dust defeating smart dust
(+3) Smart step
(+3) Smarter shelf
 Social clue handler
(+2) Social Distance perfume
(+10)(+10) Sock Trap 2
(-3) socket-seeking plug
(+3, -1) Socks in a Can 2
(+6) solar flatbed
(+3) Solar powered train
(+3) soldier decoy
(+1) Sonic screw loosener
(+3) soul clearing house
(+6, -1) space on earth
(+3, -1) spank percussion
(+2) Special counsel to save the AIDS research
 Special Votes II
(-1) Speed Decoy II
 Sports camoflage
(+1) Spring Loaded edge nets
(+4, -1) Squeeze the rovers prize
(+2) Squeeze them low
(+3) Standard of living measurement
(-2) Standardized bumper cars
 Starfleet Academy
(+6) Starship blisters
(-1) Step away
(+5, -1) stinky yard makes dogs happy
(+3, -1) Stock Market Casino
(+4, -2) Store twenty million meals in south korea
(+1) Streamlined shirt
(+2) Stripes of fewer bloodsuckers
(+5, -1) Stripper chits
(+3, -1) Stuff Tracker
 Stump removal robot
(+3, -5) stupider chickens
(+1) Sub-freezer
(+5, -7) Submarine Insertion
 Substrate focused supercomputer design
(+3, -1) Sudoku me
(+2, -1) sugar absorbing cup
(+5, -1) Sugar glass car windows
(+1) sugar ice
(+2, -3) Suicide bomber safe houses
(+2) Supercore
(+3) Swag from Ukraine
(+7) Swasher
(-12)(-12)(-12) sweaty balls
(+4) Swiftly moving sunlight
 symmedentology II
 Takeoff Clearance light
(+2, -1) Tanner pad 2
(+3) Taxi hailing app
(+3, -8)(+3, -8) Telepathic Ants
(+4, -10)(+4, -10) temperature difference generator
 temperature difference solar energy storage mechanism
(+9)(+9) The 100 million year project
(+2) The all hedging fund
(+3, -2) the All Powering battery
(+2) The Big Boat Liberator
(+1) The big glass ball o SPAAAAAAAACE viewing
(+3) The death of three lines
(+5) The Devil Went Down to Florida
(+6) The emergencies are over act
(+4) The Event of the Millenia
(+4) The floating passenger cabin
(+3) The garter of +4 lasciviousness
 The Great Roundup Resistant Weed Roundup
(+3) The hinged tire
(+5) The Human Beak
(+4, -9)(+4, -9) the last meal
(+1) The last pair of earbuds you'll ever have to buy
(+2) The leper colony
 The lock genies
(+3) The monument of why
(+1) The Real Lightsabre II
(+1) The river of wine
(+5) The rug of Zen
(+3) The Soul-Sucking Selfie II
 The square drive platter
 The squirming blanket
(+1) The steaming mug of coffee
(+5) The steaming mug of coffee II
(+2, -1) The Stream
 The suitcase that rights itself
 The Sword of Dirty Tricks
(+2) The ugly horn project
 The Wagon
(+2) The wet greyhound
(+7) Thirsty animated coaster
(+3, -9)(+3, -9) Thought Police 2200
(+3, -1) three slices of toast farm
(+3) Tilted greenhouse
(+3) tiny sculpture maker
(+23, -3)(+23, -3)(+23, -3) Tip the chef
(+1) Tire shredder
 Toaster Shoe II
(+1) toilet gloves
(+3) Torn Paper musical instrument
(+1) Tornado maker
(+7) Tornado observation dome
(-1) Torque coupling allows lighter vehicles
(-2) Tracking profile preserves privacy
(+4) Trick Rubics Cube
(+2) Trojan Thermals 2
(+1) Tube Launderette 2
(-3) two point of view adaptive camouflage
(+4) Unambitious record of civilization
 unhot pepper prank
(+1) Unique Presentation Fonts
 Unofficial Office of Scambusting
(+2) User-selected QOS
(+5, -1) Van de Graaf scepter
(+5) Verified in America
(+2, -3) viral liposuction
(+1, -2) Virtual Home .01 beta
(+6, -1) Virtual USS Enterprise
(+5, -1) Voice's driving school and discount taxi service
(+4, -1) Walking on water
(+4, -3) Wall of popcorn
 War octopodes
(+1, -2) Warm fuzzies for seals
 Water injection for blood draining
(+5, -1) Waterbra
(+8, -1) Watershirt
(-1) watershirt 2: the wickening
(+4, -1) Watson Tutorbot
(+15, -11) Watt-backed money
(+2, -1) Wave back
(+6, -1) Waxnado
(+22)(+22)(+22) We love you [Bliss]
(+3, -1) We're all gonna die, but at least I'll die rich
(+2, -1) weak sails for racing
(-1) wearable terahertz radiation emitter
(+2, -1) Weight pack for VR gaming
(+3, -1) Whole House Air Cycle
(+8, -1) whole mouth electric toothbrush
 Willpower in a box
 Windshield melter
(-1) Wine sniffing robot
(+1, -2) Wood score
(+3, -1) Wooden watch for knocking
 Woop woop bang
(+1, -2) word brain mapping
(+1, -3) Work for your passage
(-2) Workplace Achievements
 WOW guerrilla warfare by Orc
(+6, -1) Wristwatch of the aeons
(+2, -1) Writer's block demolition by automated creation of word clouds
(+6, -7) yard of eggnog
(+2, -1) You did it! Here's a treat
(+2, -1) You talk too much
 your true smell
(-1) Zinc on the ground wire
 

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