h a l f b a k e r yRIFHMAO
(Rolling in flour, halfbaking my ass off)
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Many forms of biscuit (cookie) are greatly improved by a brief immersion in a hot beverage.
However, some varieties have a tendency to structural failure if the dip time is not very carefully controlled.
Making the comestible thicker increases durability, but compromises the absorbtion of liquid.
Nil
desperandum; simply switch your grocery purchasing policy to include the new BorgCo Sierpinsky Cookies. Engineered around the topological form of the Sierpinsky Carpet <link>, with apertures down to the nanometre range, they are guaranteed to absorb the optimum amount of liquid without falling to bits.
Note: Packed by mass, not volume - contents may settle.
Sierpinski Carpet
https://en.wikipedi...i/Sierpinski_carpet
Fascinating [8th of 7, Mar 17 2017]
Hawaiian earrings
https://en.wikipedi...ki/Hawaiian_earring
[not_morrison_rm, Mar 17 2017]
Use NPM JSON cookies
https://www.npmjs.com/package/json-cookie
[pashute, Mar 20 2017]
[link]
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Could come with a pair of complimentary Hawaiian earrings. Link. |
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Based on the title, I thought "80% this is [8th]". Of course, the difference between "consistent" and "predictable" is largely semantic. |
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One thing, though. The solid part of the biscuit will need to be stronger and more dunkproof than a regular biscuit, if only because there will be less of it, and it has to support the weight of tea or coffee trapped meniscially in the interstices. |
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On the plus side, though, at least you have used the word "beverage" correctly. My recent trips to the US have revealed that Americans use it quite incorrectly and indiscriminately. I was actually asked by a waiter in a cocktail lounge if I "would like to order a beverage", whereas I had a pressing need for a drink. Equally, I have accepted offers of a "drink" in the US only to be offered Coke, water, or similar diluents. It is all very distressing, both linguistically and alcoholically. |
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// the difference between "consistent" and "predictable" is largely semantic. // |
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Actually, the difference between "consistent" and "predictable" is that they don't have all the same letters in them, and the ones they do share - c, e, i, and t - aren't in the same order. |
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//The solid part of the biscuit will need to be stronger and more
dunkproof than a regular biscuit// ow, con't rare; just dunk in
microgravity and keep the acceleration low |
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I prefer to dunk my chocolate-chip cookies in cold milk, not
a hot beverage. |
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The product will perform well in cold milk, although the rate of absorbtion will be proportionately slower. |
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No, but we make more money this way. |
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We don't need the money, of course; we only do it for entertainment. |
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Hmm, how about a layer of rice paper in the middle of the biscuit for capillary action, also handy if you need to do some chromatography in a hurry. |
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//You probably don't actually need anything of an essentially fractal topology. If biscuits were made like microfibre, perhaps// |
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Actually, this might work if the biscuits could somehow be made from large numbers of small particles (which, for simplicity, I will call "crumbs"), which were made to cohese, perhaps by some kind of heat treatment (which, for simplicity, I will call "baking"). Whether we yet possess any kind of technology that can even approach this, I truly do not know. |
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Oh and, [8th], congratulations on your recent promotion. I didn't even know Cube _had_ a Chief Assistant Tea-boy. |
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Great snack if you're counting calories. |
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Is this a job for a 3D cookie printer? Admittedly the nozzle
would have to be adapted to blob and bake at the same
time to gain the necessary accuracy needed for mm
engineered biscuits. Engineering biscuits ...mmmm. |
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You should post that (but google it first). |
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The fundamental problem with this idea is that the
amount of take-up of beverage by the cookie is
proportional to the surface area of the cookie -
beverage comes into contact with the cookie surface
and is absorbed through that surface so the greater
the surface area, the greater the volume of
beverage absorption. The Sierpinski cookie has an
infinite surface area, and so will easily absorb an
entire mug of tea, leaving none for contemplative
sipping. Further, it comes with substantial risk -
for example, accidentally dropping a Sierpinski
cookie into the sea will result in the entire
volume of all the world's seas and oceans being
rapidly absorbed, resulting in the destruction of
all sea life, the breakdown of the water cycle,
desertification, famine and the end of all life on
Earth. |
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A pretty much flawless idea, then ... |
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// accidentally dropping a Sierpinski cookie into the sea will result in the entire volume of all the world's seas and oceans being rapidly absorbed// |
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There'll be other problems long before that. In order to create the infinite surface area of the Sierpinski biscuit, an infinite number of holes have to be created. This will entail removing an infinite amount of mass from the biscuit "blank". Since that removed material must be put in a finite space, it will create a region of infinite density into which everything will fall gravitationally. |
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// accidentally dropping a Sierpinski cookie into the sea will
result in the entire volume of all the world's seas and oceans
being rapidly absorbed// |
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That made me snort my hot coffee'd cookie that I was in the
process of eating, and I burnt the inside of my right nare.
Now I'm suing. And there will be hell to pay. Hahahahaha... |
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<opens Fake Spider Selection Box, picks out dinner-plate sized specimen with dripping fangs, glowing red eyes, and battery-powered scuttling legs, places reverently into padded envelope addressed to [bliss]> |
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// a region of infinite density into which everything will fall gravitationally. // |
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It's called a "forced quantum singularly", and it's a cheap, reliable and portable energy source. We're bemused that your species still don't use them. Then again, any life-form that thinks a microprocessor with a segmented memory architecture and a non-orthogonal instruction set is a good idea is obviously only at the very first step of a long, hard, uphill path towards anything even approximating to civilization... |
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I always thought it was because they look like "trainspotters". |
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Menger sponge finger. [+] for hippo's observation |
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mmm, yum! (assuming that "sponge finger" isn't some
disgusting Scottish euphemism) |
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