Me: You have to hold my hand when were near the road Small: No! Dont want to Not hold hand Me: Youve got to, its dangerous here Small: No! No! Daddy! Not hold hand! (wriggles out of grasp) Me: No! STOP!
but shes off, faster than I can run, straight towards the busy road junction.
Oh no, not again.
So I unsling the harpoon gun from my back, calmly shoulder it, aim, and squeeze the trigger.
The bolt whistles through the air and thwacks into her back.
A perfect shot. The big Velcro pad on the harpoon (this is Mark II, of course) meshes with the Velcro target on her back, and I reel her in.
Its much better than the Mark I less mess, fewer raised eyebrows at A&E.-- Frankx, Jul 31 2006 Sounds like some form of urban fishing.-- skinflaps, Jul 31 2006 Newswire: Tragic accident blamed on Toddler Harpoon kits being issued with 'loop' targets and 'loop' harpoons - kid's father to sue.-- hippo, Jul 31 2006 Mind out she doesn't get reeled in by a gang of Japanese 'scientists', out harpooning toddlers for 'research'.-- wagster, Jul 31 2006 Nice image (though the Mark I would be nicer).Are baby reins no longer available?-- angel, Jul 31 2006 Could save lives. Poor Eric Clapton could have used this.-- DrCurry, Jul 31 2006 I could use the Mark I version...-- DesertFox, Jul 31 2006 [+]-- Dub, Jul 31 2006 Sounds like you need one of those toddler harness-leash deals, [Frankx].-- bungston, Jul 31 2006 This is not nearly what I thought it was.-- shapu, Jul 31 2006 a toddler can out-run you? [Frankx], you need to work out ;)-- xaviergisz, Aug 01 2006 yes she can, and yes, I do!-- Frankx, Aug 01 2006 Love it! [+]-- The_Englishman_Abroad, Aug 01 2006 .( } |\\==o'#=== ----------------+ ) |-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Aug 02 2006 English. :-(-- blissmiss, Aug 02 2006 Whats wrong bliss? It's not like I 'have' kids... it's more the thought of spearing them with a velcro harpoon gun from a distance of eighty paces.... *blink*-- The_Englishman_Abroad, Aug 02 2006 Oh, you guys like children? Me too! Can we swap recipes?
Only joking, this would be great for my pet monster - er, I mean - little brother...-- froglet, Aug 02 2006 I think lassooing children to whisk them out of the path of danger would look cooler.-- hippo, Aug 02 2006 Although it would be rather tragic if you lasooes their necks to whisk them out of safety, [hippo].-- froglet, Aug 02 2006 random, halfbakery