Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Trumpets

Government employees work as assistants for the socially inept
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Human rights of "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" are understood to include "equal treatment under the law" including prohibition of discrimination based on disability.

Through no fault of their own, many people are endowed with lackluster natural abilities to detect lying or hidden motives in others, to speak confidently and persuasively in their own interests, or generally to out-wit other people.

All social arenas, including business and relationships, include ample opportunities for dishonesty. This is discriminatory against dullards.

To protect the interests of differently-aware citizens, everyone with sufficient credulity and/or obliviousness is appointed an assistant who is a Government employee.

Government workers doing this job would be known as "Trumpeters", because their role is to trumpet the interests of those they serve, and because their behavior when doing their job correctly resembles that of a certain contemporary American politician and businessman.

In short, to prevent discrimination based on social skills or wisdom, everyone with below-average social skills or judgement would be encouraged to delegate their decision-making to a Government-employed solicitor who would accompany them anytime they needed to make a decision.

sninctown, Sep 01 2015

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       What could possibly go wrong ... ?
8th of 7, Sep 01 2015
  

       "Human rights" is a phrase that generally raises my hackles.   

       There are no 'rights', but privileges afforded by the society in which we live, and subject to consent and support of all participants in that society.   

       Freedom of speech? We're all careful with our vocabulary in case something we say is taken as indication of racial or religious prejudice, or is seen as 'offensive' to others. Our host society requires us to moderate our speech on order to be 'acceptable'. In the privacy of our own homes, or in the company of friends and like-minded people, or in purely academic or objective debate this micro-society allows us the privilege of verbalizing things which are taboo in the wider world.   

       Pursuit of happiness? Only if what makes you happy falls within your host society's view of acceptable: most societies aim to deny an active paedophile's "pursuit of happiness".   

       Liberty? No you can't just go wherever you please. Your liberty is restricted by boundaries laid down by a person or company or government that 'owns' property. Overstep the boundaries and you risk having your already controlled liberty even more limited.   

       Life? Subject to your host society agreeing that your behaviour is acceptable and that you don't violate any of its most serious laws AND that your health and well being require an acceptable level of investment in terms of financial and other resources. OK, some societies don't enact the death penalty, but whether you like it or not there is a line drawn when it comes to the bill for health or social care. If medical treatment is too costly or the provision of care is problematic your host society will cease to see the end of your life as a problem which much be solved at all costs.   

       No-one has the 'right' to anything. Everything is privilege and must be earned. Society sets the tariff on how much effort we need to invest to earn those privileges. Talk of 'human rights' is an example of a society which grants the aforementioned privileges and demands nothing in return.   

       ... and breathe.
Tulaine, Sep 01 2015
  

       I thought this was going to be a topical, Donald Trump-themed idea.
hippo, Sep 01 2015
  

       “The real hopeless victims of mental illness are to be found among those who appear to be most normal. "Many of them are normal because they are so well adjusted to our mode of existence, because their human voice has been silenced so early in their lives, that they do not even struggle or suffer or develop symptoms as the neurotic does." They are normal not in what may be called the absolute sense of the word; they are normal only in relation to a profoundly abnormal society. Their perfect adjustment to that abnormal society is a measure of their mental sickness. These millions of abnormally normal people, living without fuss in a society to which, if they were fully human beings, they ought not to be adjusted.”   

       ~Aldous Huxley~   

       Seemed appropriate.   

       If I had a pet trump I wouldn't feed it.
RayfordSteele, Sep 03 2015
  
      
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