h a l f b a k e r y"Put it on a plate, son. You'll enjoy it more."
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
browse anonymously,
or get an account
and write.
register,
|
|
|
Ever found after washing your hands at a groin-level basin to find that the over-enthusiastic tap has launched water at your light-coloured leg-wear, and the world now thinks you've had an embarrassing trouser incident? *
The Trouser Bib comes in a variety of designs, two of which are described here.
The
first takes the form of a roller-blind mechanism, worn as a belt.
A swift tug unravels the bib, to cover the vulnerable area.
A second tug retracts the bib.
The second is a modified sporran, with a radial leaf-shutter-like mechanism.
Here, a simple twist deploys the crotch umbrella.
A second twist retracts.
Groinal moistness is avoided, and hilarity does not ensue.
* I have.
Inuit loophole for sealskin sporrans
http://www.bbc.co.u...ds-islands-11373000 You can't make this stuff up ... [8th of 7, Sep 23 2010]
[link]
|
|
Apart from the hilarity of wearing a sporran with trousers, of course. |
|
|
If you're worried, splash some water on your hip as camoflouge. |
|
|
Needs more pyrotechnics. "Thermite-based Instantaneous Trouser Drier". |
|
|
We think you should rephrase that as "But that's a risk I'm willing for you to take on my behalf." |
|
|
Learn not to urinate upon your hands? |
|
|
//Learn not to urinate upon your hands?// |
|
|
Won't help if, say, you took a dump, wiped, and
_oops_-- >finger-through-the-paper.< You wash your
hands in the same position, don't you, for #1 or #2? |
|
|
Bun, for the umbrella alone...and for the sporran. |
|
|
Sporrans are an endangered species ... <link> |
|
|
Well, then, we'd best get on with it. |
|
|
//Needs more pyrotechnics.// A stylish gent, strolling along
the boulevard while idly deploying and retracting the crotch
umbrella, in the manner of Maurice Chevalier twiddling a
cane,
will be *quite* enough thank you kindly. |
|
|
//It also happens while washing dishes// I had to ask Mrs AWOL to explain what that was. |
|
| |