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Speak only in Haiku's. You will bring beauty into everyone's day, at the same time you are forced to be extra thoughtful about everything you say and therefore likely to skip any idol chatter.
Good morning dear wife
It is now time to arise
Would you like coffee?
Try it for a day.
[a
roommate of mine came up with this back in school. I was recently reminded of it with the limerick posting]
Haikus for use at breakfast
http://www.drtoast.com/toasthaiku.html Haikus about toast (from "Intensely focused/ I anticipate my toast/ Somewhere a dog barks" to "Angry toastless man/ Malfunctioning appliance/ Senseless killing spree") [hippo, Sep 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]
Presidential Haiku
http://haiku575.blogspot.com/ [Scott_D, Sep 14 2000]
Poetic Legalese
http://www.halfbake...a/Poetic_20Legalese Everything should be poetic... [Detly, Sep 14 2000]
The Shiki Internet Haiku Salon
http://mikan.cc.mat.../Start-Writing.html A short guide to writing haiku. [DrBob, Sep 14 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]
The Brighton Festival Haiku Delivery Service
http://www.brightonhaiku.com Even more haiku. [DrBob, Sep 14 2000]
engrish galore....japanese english
http://www.engrish.com its not haiku..but write any comments on the site on this page.....make sure u have a look at a fair amount of the site though- Roisin [kaz, Sep 14 2000]
Roof Irrigation Cooler
http://www.halfbake...Irrigation_20Cooler Was reminded of this beautifully-written idea... [-alx, Sep 14 2000]
Presidential Haiku
http://haiku575.blogspot.com/ [Scott_D, Oct 21 2004]
Start Sentences With Conjunctions
http://www.getitwri.../archive/032601.htm It's acceptable under certain circumstances [DeathNinja, Oct 21 2004]
[link]
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A thoughtful idea
Which makes for thoughtful speaking
Mouse clicks on "vote for" |
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I doubt it would fly.
Being thoughtful takes more than
counting syllables.
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Besides, haiku's not
any more beautiful than
other speech patterns.
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Take these sentences,
for instance; they are haiku
if I split the lines.
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Are they more pleasing
with pauses every few words?
I don't see the point.— | bookworm,
Sep 16 2000, last modified Dec 11 2000 |
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Case in point: a friend in college came up with a series of "urban haiku"; pieces in haiku form more appropriate to modern life than the fall of a cherry blossom. One of the ones I remember: |
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Give me your money
Give me your money, asshole
Give me your money |
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I like haiku, it doesn't strain my attention span, as most longer poetry does, which unlike politics, typically contains little gratuitous sex and violence. |
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It did remind me of a poem I wrote after an experience in Albuquerque some years ago. I wasn't going to share it, I didn't want to chog blahgingers idea, but since bookworm broke the ice, I'll go for it - it sounds kinda like haiku, although I think there's too many syllables - |
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Vato, shotgun shouting in Whataburger,
eyes like dull black slate - tatooed trouble.
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Not what ginger had in mind, I suspect, but hey! I'm not a poet! |
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[bookworm] by your definition, everything that has ever been written is technically strings of Haikus without the correct spacing....which is obviously false. Your postings above are *not* a bunch of haikus, but if you do not realize that then I am not surprised that you do not see the point. |
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Writing a Haiku takes more than counting syllables. A single thought or image is self contained in those 17 syllables. I remember learning and writing them in grade school and liked them because it is not to hard to write one just as good as your average ancient Japanese poet. |
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Of course the everyday conversational haikus would not have such 'mystical' subject matter, but the elegance of the format would make listening to people a little more bearable. I do agree that it will probably not catch on any time soon, but that does not make it a bad idea. |
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You're right, blahginger. This idea has value to me simply for its ability to tickle some relatively poorly-exercised brain neurons, regardless of its practicality. I think that's the whole appeal of HB. |
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By the way, bg, when your idol chatters, does it chatter in haiku? |
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[Scott_D] Ooh! Someone using "Chog". |
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----- HalfBakery still
----- fills half my mind. Autumn clouds
----- on the train ride home. |
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another upside to this is more people would actually think before they spoke. |
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All speech in haiku.
It would be a blast. Except
No work would get done. |
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Lets see... School:
I know this is late.
But my dog ate my homework.
Please don't hurt my grade.
Or what about for work (used to work at a grocery store, where kids would get high off nitrous in the back room):
I'm not getting high.
The whipped cream can was broken.
My nose fixed it well.
For high school football coaches (or at least the one at my school):
Get in the endzone!
What is your f@#$ing problem?
You're f@#$ing worthless!— | djhotsauce,
Dec 09 2000, last modified Dec 10 2000 |
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Think / three thoughts / in succession |
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The sun will shine on
While the blind curse the darkness
May you rot in hell |
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that's what's cool about haiku. you can make anything into a poem. it sounds clever too. you could take a famous novel, say, and rearrange it so the entire book is made up of haikus, without changing the actual text. maybe i'll try it. i'd speak in haiku if i could think quickly enough to arrange them in my head. |
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At seventeen miles an hour |
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I'll wake up in just three hours |
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I reach for my sunglasses |
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[mrshrum] the main point of the idea is to force you to slow down and think a lot before you say anything. Thinking quickly is not required. |
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At first I was shocked
That "All Your Base" fit so well.
But it's Japanese. |
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You will bring beauty into |
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In order to fit "everything that has ever been written" into "technically strings of Haikus," everything that has ever been written would require some slight reworking. |
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Who let the dogs out? (woof woof) |
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spamcakes galore fuckwits more |
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....dammit and i really wanted the extra 'it'.... stupid haikus |
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Buffy had no time
except for those little poems
that sound like a sneeze
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Your half-baked theory
Is silly, but kind of cute
a croissant for you. |
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Someone named [Detly]
Baked at work in abundance
Now is Firewalled. |
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[Detly] was last seen
On the evening news broadcast
Gun to tech people. |
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Cedar once posted
Haiku out of proper form.
[Unabubba] riled. |
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And so if they rhyme
I'm pretty sure that's all fine
'Cause now's freestyle time. |
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