h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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The British Royal Family is effectively an expensive mass entertainment spectacle; paid for by the British taxpayer at great expense. The taxes spent on keeping up the Royal Family could be spent on more practical things. However, a modest continental-style "bicycle monarchy" would not suit Britain
(or the observers in the US, Australia, etc. who take advantage of the existence of this source of entertainment)
There are several ways in which the British monarchy could be made to pay its own way. One would be to install webcams in Buckingham Palace, one in each room, and use the revenue from banner advertising to pay some of the costs of the Monarchy's upkeep.
If that fails and the taxpayers become tired of footing the bill, the whole thing could be sold off to Aaron Spelling or another entertainment professional who could turn it into a money-making enterprise. This may involve moving the Royal Family to the Hollywood hills, and perhaps increasing the frequency and sensationality of the periodic royal scandals.
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The the web cam idea... And viewers could vote on who should be excommunicated (or whatever) from the Royal Family. They would have to do stunts etc. and maybe fight eachother. The winner would get (and rightfully deserve) to be Queen. In a sense, she would then be an elected representative.| — | lubbit,
Mar 28 2001, last modified Mar 29 2001 |
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Why not just suggest to them that they get "real jobs" that actually bring home a paycheck. After all, Princess Anne is an accomplished equestrian and rode in the Olympics. She could have made money training horses for people. Her ex-husband (Capt. Mark Phillips) is self-sustaining as a riding coach. Prince Charles could give Polo Clinics and guide foxhunting trips across the English Countryside with his beloved, Camilla P-B. Prince Andrew....is he still in the military? If not, he should be a commercial heliocopter pilot or something to that effect. The Queen could easily be a bloodstock agent for Thoroughbreds. What does happen to the horses bred by the Queen? What happens to any money the royal family makes by racing? Actually, horse breeding, selling, and racing should most probably be the main way that the royals support themselves. I suppose some of them would be qualified to be art and antique dealers too. |
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Queen Elizabeth II is pretty much self sustaining. She has a good stock portfoliio, and most of the other members of the Royal household have their own companies and stock portfolios, so i suggest, that you change your idea from a self sustaining royal family from the POV of money, and change it to the idea that they are self sustaining in that they only marry within their own family and so are self sustaining in that way. Also, it would vbe good to see how genepool deficiency effects Royalty. |
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[Of course, it could just turn them into redkneck hillbillies] |
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d-eschew...please don't move to Hollywood Hills. I rather enjoy the neighborhood as is. |
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Our house *is* the neighbourhood, Elizabeth. |
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[Haha, i made thubwax the woman][Why doesn't anyone use bad englich anymore?] |
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Maybe we could do a sort of Royal 'Big Brother', and set up a new TV channel with ad breaks every 5 minutes, to really generate a load of money (maybe not enough for their golden toilet seats though). The royals could keep the plebs amused all day with their antics. This comes with the added advantage of us being able to see Lizzie picking her nose. |
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Hire them out for commercials: |
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"Hi, I'm Prince Charles. Welcome to Carpet Discount World, where you'll find big savings on remnants, discontinued patterns..." |
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Really just a tiny step from their bestowing endorsements on businesses/products. Carpet Discount World could become "Bespoke Carpetier to his Majesty..." -- that is, if they weren't in Fresno. |
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