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If you've ever been really hyped at a gig or a club, only to find that all your mates are either too drunk or too lazy to go balls-to-the-wall mental with you in the mosh pit, then you know how frustrating that feels. You could try to drag some attractive stranger onto the floor, but you're pug-ugly.
Well, now there's someone to dance with you whenever you want.
Yes. Remember those weird little egg-shaped things called Weebles, designed to look like freakishly fat, pointy-headed people with arms and legs disturbingly melded into their bodies? You push them over and they roll right back. As the jingle went: "Weebles wobble, but they don't fall down."
Well, lonely punk rocker. Now you can have your very own life-size pogoing weeble. Thanks to the hydraulic piston-action spring mechanism, the Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weeble, not only springs back up when it falls over, it even fires itself into the air at time intervals determined by its on-board rhythm sensor (the same technology used in those dancing flower things), and at angles determined only by the wild yawing and pitching of its wobble. And just to add to the excitement, we've added graspable 3-D modelled arms and shoulders so that you and your Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weeble can throw each other about to your heart's content. Now comes with various multi-coloured punk hairstyle attachments.
NB. Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weeble Inc. will not be held responsible for any injuries sustained during usage.
(?) And, boy, do they wobble
http://www.yesterda...ows/toys/ty1088.php
dr_photon - this should bring you up to speed. [salachair, Mar 21 2002]
[link]
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I think it will need some sort of carrying device, like
straps and a handle. Something that big is kinda awkward
to transport, especially if you have no car. It would be
nice to decorate and personalize your own
MoshBuddyPogoWeeble, to look like the bad grrl or boy of
your fantasies. |
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And when they're really popular (and the aftermarket to make them stronger has taken off) they'll drive actual people out of the mosh pits entirely. |
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Dancing with actual people is, of course, superior (and much less sad), but sometimes people just don't have the stamina of the Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weeble. With enough batteries, you need never again be stuck on the sidelines watching others dance their little socks off to 'Anarchy in the UK'. Or perhaps you and your friends could have Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weeble Rodeos. |
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I think you would rent them at the dance venue itself and there would also need to be a collection system for them when enough real people jump into the pit. |
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Perhaps [Aristotle]s collection system could be ropes to lift up the MBPW out of the mosh pit. Hopefully no moshers would try to hold on. This would also create an interesting air sculpture (to gaze at, when you're not so much "really hyped" as "really mashed"). I wonder whether the ropes, held taut while the MBPW is in use, could provide an interesting competitive sport for crowd-surfers.
I'm not claiming a lot of understanding of this genre... I suspect I may be more similar to Mephista. I like dancing in high heels and swishy skirts, preferably with an only-just-controlled level of sexual tension. |
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As an attendee of many a Hawkwind concert in my time there has been known to develop mosh areas for people who like to jump around to the livelier numbers. |
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Death unto all infidels in oil ... |
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Rather than ropes, how about nets, which could be set off to sweep through the air, gathering up stray MBPW's as they leap? The image of a big bumper fishing-trawler-style net of MBPW's thrashing out of control over the heads of spectators might well add to the exciting atmosphere of the venue. |
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[lewisgirl] I'm just trying to visualise the Tango-Partner-Ballroom-Weeble. Or the Disco-Dancing-Bouncy-Weeble. Might work, but more complex construction involved, I think. |
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GF, If you want to make the Disco version (or the more contemporary Pop version) I won't buy it unless it can do all the hand movements to 'Tragedy' (a la 'Steps' I mean) and the Locomotion. |
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[lewisgirl] This could get quite complex, but if a programmable Pop-Weeble prototype can be developed, then all sorts of new territories are opened up. Imagine synchronised Weeble Boy-Bands.... Weebles2Men... WeebleZone... Weeble'Sync... etc.... all dancing their weeble asses off. The thought horrifies me, of course, as a punk/rock/loungecore/alternative dude, but I find it oddly compelling. And surely a potential money-spinner. |
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[waugs] Inflatable Sumo-Suits are available right now. All we need is a pneumatic-drill with a rubber-tip. |
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//synchronised Weeble Boy-Bands.... Weebles2Men... WeebleZone... Weeble'Sync... etc.... //
They are, aren't they? |
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Ah, but what about the day when the mosh-pit
pogo-weebles and synchronized boy-band weebles get
complex enough computer chips and artificial intelligence
that they begin to outsmart and outdance even their
human creators? They will have built their strength
through years of moshing, and soon they'd amass huge
pogo-weeble armies and overtake the earth. Of course,
with a harmless name like "Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weebles,"
how bad could this be? A peaceful and just Weeble
society is just as feasible as a human one. This could be
evolution at work. |
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[lg]: Weebles have more talent. |
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[smizzou]: Can you really see such opposite forces as Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weebles and Synchro-Weeble BoyBands joining together? Oh, wait. That's nu-metal, isn't it? |
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we simply need to create a race of anti-weebles who sit around looking board (posibly even going so far as to have them spending every second of free time playing dungeons and dragons)... however, when the weebles make there move they spring into action and all the weebles are instantly anihalated and converted into energy... |
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And just what is wrong with Dungeons & Dragons? |
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I'm with waugs. I'd love to try the MBPW Suit. In fact, I'll volunteer to test the prototype ... to Blur's "Song 2", preferably. Woo-hoo! |
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Guess what, Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weeble! Tonight you're the designated driver! |
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I personally do think, when you buy your Mosh-Buddy Pogo-Weeble, that it should extra options such as a springloaded arm to launch you over the top of your fellow mosh-pitters as they carry you towards the stage. |
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Like the idea, like the title. As for customizing it, I suggest going with the Mr. Potato-Head method. |
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I can see this idea going down an absolute storm with all the E-d up ravers out there. |
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zippyanna: foam padding around the solid frame would probably be a safety feature, although for the full moshing effect, elbows and suchlike should be solid enough to cause limited damage. Such is the thrill of danger in the mosh-pit. |
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Mephista: I agree that dancing with real people is better. The point about the MBPW is that solo moshing just isn't the same. It's not about embarassment - believe me, I have no shame in giving it laldy on the dance-floor, on my tod - simply that you need someone to grab onto, bounce off of, to throw about and, in turn, to throw you about. |
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-alx: Rave-Buddy Monged-Weeble. I like it. |
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I'll buy one, so long as it is painted to look like Chief Wiggum. |
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Rather than a carrying device, why not flip-down foot pegs and a handle on the head so you can pogo/ride it home? |
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Neat concept, high performance pogo-weebles in the moshpit, buddies aboard, rat-trapped to the foot pegs of their pogo-weebles, bouncing 15-20 feet in the air, bouncing off each other, the floor, the ceiling, posts, the walls. Now that's extreme moshing! |
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What the hell is a weeble? I never saw one. Is it kinda like one of those inflatable cartoon( as in Bozo the clown) punching bag with sand in the bottom so that they will almost fall over when you punch them and then come right back up again (and bob around a bit). |
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I think you can do the same thing, just make the punching bag bigger and stronger (they're made for 5 year olds) and install a sproinger unit in the bottom instead of the weight-sand.I suggest either a spring or a pneumatic cylinder with a small tank and compressor. I think a sproinger with a spring would be easier, but the pneumatic could inflate itself automatically with the waste air (air leaving tbhe cylinder after it ahs been used. It would just use a motor to comprss the spring (like a pogo stick) or pump up a small air tank, then the sproinger unit would sproing and launch the MBPW |
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Guy man do you know the size of a Weeble? The kids version must have wiegh about half a pound, scale it up to full size!! That baby would wiegh about 350lbs you'ed hit it and it would squash you to death, man crush you to death by a giant Weeble, that wrong! |
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I totally, totally need one of these as a me replacement. See, I tend to get a little carried away at the playing of certain songs (killing in the name of, lithium, you know the drill....) and often have to go have a sit down and acouple of pints of water at the end. This leaves my girlfriend on the dancefloor on her own sometimes, normally just as her favorite song has just come on. If you could pack a MBPW into a little grenade type device that auto inflates on landing, I could nonchalently throw one over my shoulder on my way to the bar, keeping her happy. |
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Also the grenade version would be good for lightening fast assults on my union's dance floor whenever they pull the rock/alt night infavor of some touring House DJ (b*stards) |
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