Modern Minor Baking Individual

I am the very model of a baking individual
My concepts range from comical, unusual to whimsical
I’m quite adept at cons and prose, and I’m pedant, it is true,
From witty puns and allusion, to satire and a well aimed spoof.

I’m very good at fancy dances; I can Judo Tango too,
I often hit my favorite bar and bring my drinking bud: voodoo
I can make a bold statement with hair in shape of favorite fruit
And set it off quite jauntily with my personal lightning rod suit

I try to think of clever things that will not ever net me bones
Like panic pins and tails for all or even those flocking road cones.
I’m sometimes proud to be in such a hierarchical progeny
From drbob, to unabub to po and bliss and Bristol “z”

You see in matters flighty, odd or downright unpredictable,
I am the very model of a baking individual