h a l f b a k e r yBusiness Failure Incubator
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
browse anonymously,
or get an account
and write.
register,
|
|
|
Please log in.
Before you can vote, you need to register.
Please log in or create an account.
|
Lunar Biometrics
Fingerprints ?, retinal scans ?, cranial patterns ? umm... nope. | |
A buttprint is one of the few biometrics that cannot be imitated through simple observation of the subject (unlike height weight, photograph) and, since the butt is normally covered up underneath pants or skirt, there's no way of getting a print in order to duplicate it.
There's still room for
opportunistic robberies, but unlike an eyeball or a thumb, a butt is somewhat difficult to remove from the rest of the body. If a thief were *that* determined to get into the ATM of the future or restricted area, it would be easier to bring the entire body along.
And, since it's usually easier to explain carrying an unconscious person than it is to explain carrying a corpse or portion thereof, the victim stands a better chance of surviving the whole harrowing experience, and with their butt intact.
One Application...
The_20Toilet_20that_20Never_20Forgets [phundug, Sep 30 2008]
let's take a look at liposuction...
http://www.liposuction.com/gallery/018/ [xandram, Sep 30 2008]
(?) Buttcheek Bandit
http://www.kearneyh...ept_id=577571&rfi=6 could finally be brought to justice if this were a common biometric. [jutta, Oct 01 2008]
Innovative anti-theft device wins award
http://cyclopunk.bl...i-theft-device.html Baked! Well, not really. [Wrongfellow, Nov 12 2011]
New biometric technology: butt biometrics
http://www.homeland...ogy-butt-biometrics [swimswim, Dec 27 2011]
A smart toilet could identify you by your analprint
https://www.theverg...detection-analprint The anus has 35 or 37 creases, which are as unique as fingerprints", apparently. [Wrongfellow, Apr 11 2020]
[link]
|
|
"Welcome to the new secure facility, Mr. President. I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to drop your trousers and place your ass on the scanner." [+] |
|
|
Been puzzling over where the moon comes in on to this. |
|
|
[neelandan] Moon - The verb rather than the noun. |
|
|
Stick'em in your family...al...bum! |
|
|
We're going to need a bigger scanner. |
|
|
I'm thinking that any area of skin would provide a pattern of hair follicles that would be unique and unchanging. If the entire body was scanned into the biometric, the security scanner could request any smaller area on any particular day--"Today, Mr. Jones, your left bicep, please.". Then the spoofer would have to carry around the entire body, yes. |
|
|
Bun Pending--
What about using Liposuction to alter the lunar-landing pad? |
|
|
Didn't want to get into operational details, but I imagine you'd want to renew your butt-o-metric after liposuction if it was really that drastic. |
|
|
thinking retinal and butt, I wonder if everyone has a different anal vein pattern . |
|
|
You mean, in order to get in, you will have to stick the scanner up there where the anal vein patterns are? |
|
|
I think we can manage with external patterns, using a IR scanner or something. Of course there will always be people who want to be extreme and have a full-time insert connected to a speaker, broadcasting "I'm me! I'm me!" but those would be a small minority... one would hope.
No, the key here is that it's a *non*invasive biometric (unlike expensive, tech/time-consuming DNA), yet it's a biometric that is normally not exposed to the public, so more secure than other methods. There may be a valid argument about public-toilets, however the ID-thief would have to keep the toilet clean, thus arousing suspicion. § x1 |
|
|
Oh god. Unfortunately, I can picture the illustration on the junk mail: |
|
|
"Warning! You may already be a victim of identity theft!" |
|
|
"Who the hell is 'Bob'?!" |
|
|
[FT]'s idea has made it to the real world; see link. |
|
|
^ I'd request royalties but I'm not sure what form it would take. |
|
|
I have to admit the <link> could give new meaning to the phrase "flying by the seat of one's pants". |
|
| |