Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Happy War

 Recreational drugs used in the aid of democracy
  (+4, -1)
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Traditional warfare says, "I try to kill you, you try to kill me". Then somebody loses. Everybody expects somebody else to lose, but experience shows that at least half of them have been wrong.

How about warfare where nobody loses. Select a drug. It needs to make people relaxed, peaceful, serene and friendly. For about four hours. Spread it from a high-altitude plane over the enemy's camp. Then stroll in and politely ask them for their weapons.

—sadie, Dec 06 2002

The True Weapon of Peace http://www.halfbake...Weapon_20of_20Peace
is weed, apparently. [my face your, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Drugs Win Drugs War https://store.theon...atalogno=ON1010WHLG
An Onion classic, in wearable form. [my face your, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

On acid and on maneouvre http://hes.iki.fi/v...n_Brtish_Troops.mpg
As a general thing, if there's a chance that something can be weaponized then someone has already tried. (It's as insidious as verbification.)

(This is an old memepool link; you may have seen it before.) [Monkfish, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

'Barefoot in the Head' by Brian Aldiss http://www.amazon.c...026-8127473-9197240
Classic science fiction novel set in the aftermath of the 'Acid head' wars. [DrBob, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

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       So... drop atomized ecstasy on the hostile army? Cute, and perhaps not that far off from some of the "nonlethal countermeasures" that are being proposed/developed now. But will this guarantee nonviolent conflict resolution? Perhaps the enemy, when you ask them for their weapons, will smile and shoot you (in a relaxed, serene manner). And that's ignoring the possibility of side effect-induced deaths. Besides, even if no one dies in the "conflict", there would still be a discernable winner and loser.
Nonetheless, I suppose it's an admirable goal.
—Pharaoh Mobius, Dec 06 2002
   

       soma?
—mihali, Dec 06 2002
   

       Don't ask, don't tell
—thumbwax, Dec 06 2002
   

       You're proposing use of chemical weapons.   

       As recent events in Russia show, dosage is extremely hard to meter when you're using this approach. The effective dose and the lethal dose of a particular drug are not usually separated by more than an order of magnitude or two, and you just can't control how much of the drug any particular individual will receive that accurately.   

       If this were to somehow become popular, combatants could easily don respiratory filters. The worst of the neurotoxins will go right through the skin, but good luck finding a safe but disabling "happy drug" that does so.
—egnor, Dec 06 2002
   

       <private joke> - Heheh.. I had a similar idea for christmas dinner..</private joke>
—yamahito, Dec 06 2002
   

       Just finished up a happy war , damn it was fun
—thumbwax, Dec 07 2002
   

       Unabubba: it was Crystal Meth (MDA), which the German military used to keep their soldiers awake. Similar high as cocaine, but it lasts for 7-8 hours... then you stay awake for another 24 hours after that.
—Tsunami, Aug 11 2003
   

       Unsurprising. The Airforce has used Amphetemines for a long time.
—Madcat, Jan 06 2004
   

       Yes, but I don't think that the military have to worry about the Federal Police.
—Detly, Jan 07 2004
   

       The side effects are less bad than dying from inattention while tired.
—sninctown, Apr 12 2005
   

       I'm sure this would lead to a rush of volunteers for the military.
—hidden truths, Apr 12 2005
   

       When I read the subtitle, I though this would entail going out to battle, but instead of shooting the other guy, holding out a needle, and each shooting heroin until one of you Overdosed.   

       Pull the needle out, rinse, and repeat.
—Blumster, Apr 12 2005
   

       [Blumster] I don't know, and I'm pretty sure that I don't want to know what goes on in your sick, twisted mind when you think this sort of thing up. Do you sit in your hidden lair near a volcano, evilly thinking things like this to put, with steepled fingers, and a evil cackle?
—froglet, Apr 12 2005
   

       Lets put it this way, I think [benfrost] is a comic genius.
—Blumster, Apr 13 2005
   

       If they started using respirators to avoid inhaling the drug, you could just drop a shitlaod of tranq darts. Just hope that one guy dosen't get hit with, like, ten darts at once.
—notmarkflynn, Dec 17 2005
   


 

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