h a l f b a k e r y"More like a cross between an onion, a golf ball, and a roman multi-tiered arched aquaduct."
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Rather than dedicate all of that energy to keeping stuff ultra
hygienic and packing people into stalls so that you can jam them
full
of over fatted, sugared and alcoholed food products, this platform
would sell subscriptions to what would essentially be food pills,
and
then organize recreational
playground activities for all ages with
the
extra energy that would have been spent cooking, and preparing,
the food and paying for all of the hospital support and lost time at
work that an over-fooded populace engenders.
Everyone subscribing would be fed something along the lines of 6
oz
of plain fish, one glass of water, plain broccoli, rice and two
pieces
of fruit, once or twice a day, and then dll of their extra
recreational
time would be spent in the following environment:
Restaurant spaces could basically be optimized to move people
around instead of to trap them in one place and force as much
food
as possible through them. Young people could be outfitted with
foam wings and padding and be put in wind tunnels and older folks
could don protective prophylactic gear and canned air apparatus
and
roll around in a great big pile feeling eachother up.
[link]
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( echo ) " Step away from the Red Bull vending machine and keep your hands where we can see them " |
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"All Your Pies Are Belong To Us
" |
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You've somehow created a replacement for one minor
function of restaurants, tacked on a whole bunch of
things restaurants DONT do, and made the whole
experience as enjoyable as, well, eating a tasteless
bit of nutrition and tumbling about with some old
people. As an experience: fail. as an idea: fail. As a
replacement for what it's supposed to replace: fail. As
satire: c. I'm actually kind of impressed. |
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