Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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I like this idea, only I think it should be run by the government.

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Auto-tune Baby Monitors

Keep crying lil baby, your mom and I are making out
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Once the baby starts crying, karaoke like background songs and drums kick in and the crying is converted to vocal, bass, guitar melodies, whatever.
leinypoo13, Dec 27 2013

the opposite _22Sounds_20of_20th..._20Masking_20Device
Keep baby from wondering what those strange noises are, or traumatizing the teenagers. [FlyingToaster, Dec 27 2013]

Autotune of crying baby http://www.youtube....watch?v=diLG-4lJows
[FlyingToaster, Jan 02 2014]

[link]






       Funny. Very disturbing, but funny.
doctorremulac3, Dec 27 2013
  

       Didn't Skrillex get started this way?   

       Hey, if reversed and used to convert adult sleeping sounds, it could make for a lullaby snorechestra.   

       "Hide your kids, hide your wife..."
normzone, Dec 27 2013
  

       If adults like adultry will infants like the infantry?
doctorremulac3, Dec 27 2013
  

       Only missing childry and teenagery, which I guess would be 1) a child size centrifuge next to the shower and 2) a new term for relatively small German soldiers
leinypoo13, Dec 27 2013
  

       "God save the Queen" by SIDS Vicious...
4whom, Jan 02 2014
  

       gurnaoke [+]
xenzag, Jan 02 2014
  

       This idea went a different direction than I expected. I was hoping that when the intelligent baby monitor was roused by the sound of baby's cries, it would automatically respond by playing pre-recorded gentle shushing sounds in either mommy's or daddy's voice to reassure baby that it is not alone. If the crying continues for more than a minute, then a lineup of pre-recorded lullabies by mommy and daddy begins. If after two or three minutes of that doesn't quiet the child, then a battery-powered mobile hanging above the crib powers on and begins to softly glow like a dim lava lamp with everchanging colors, slowly rotating. And thats when Bing Crosby takes over for mom and dad. If the crying persists beyond the soft crooning of "Tooralooraloora", "White Cllifs of Dover", and "Little Lambs Eat Ivy", then it's definitely time for mom or dad to get up and change some diapers. [Other artists and playlists, incidentally, are available for more advanced children, because we know that your child is very very special and gifted.]
jurist, Jan 02 2014
  

       [FlyingToaster] Thats awesome and hilarious
leinypoo13, Jan 02 2014
  
      
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