Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Why on earth would you want that many gazelles anyway?

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shoefortunedispenser

 available in sneakers, too
  (+4, -1)
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I love to read the fortunes from Chinese fortune cookies, but I don't eat Chinese food that often. I know one can buy a whole bag of them, but it's not the same. It's some kind of cosmic recognition as to which fortune is your own. The excitement mounts as one unfurls the prophetic words of sages.... So, if you're hanging out and just have an urge for a fortune to muse about, use the shoefortunedispenser. A small device with a reel has been inserted into the heel of a shoe, or the large sole of a sneaker. There is a tiny roll of paper with perforations, each containing a fortune or similar idea that slides onto the reel. There is a nearly imperceptible button feature on the side of the heel or sole. Just press the tiny button and your fortune will slide out from the little slot in back. **use in times of emergency boredom; scary situations; dinner with the relatives; or just for fun.
—xandram, Feb 22 2006

Or go here http://predictions.astrology.com/fc/
(I'm afraid you get to see an ad before they reveal the fortune.) [DrCurry, Feb 22 2006]

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       Conshoefus say, fortune from heel lacks sole, while soul that lacks fortune not heal.   

       Actually, you could do this as street art: leave Chinese fortunes lying face down with little bits of chewing gum on top. Then the gum will stick to the shoes of random people walking past, thereby delivering the shoe fortunes to them without any fancy mechanisms.   

       I'm sure you could find someone to do that as performance art or something.
—DrCurry, Feb 23 2006
   

       I love performance art like that. I always thought that performance art is to art what the halfbakery is to inventions.
—wagster, Feb 23 2006
   

       I read this as "shoeoffortunedispenser" and imagined a vending machine for mercenary footwear.
—coprocephalous, Feb 23 2006
   

       and I just love halfbakers' imaginations!
—xandram, Feb 23 2006
   

       [phundug] Your therapist asked me to send you one of these.
—xandram, May 17 2006
   


 

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