h a l f b a k e r y"Not baked goods, Professor; baked bads!" -- The Tick
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The only stationery item that has not been reinvented for the 21st century is the lowly paperweight.
In this age of electronic picture frames, we ought to have electronic paperweights with a USB adapter on the bottom, which could include the following functionality:
- A 3-D hologram within it,
which changes every 60 seconds
- Heating function so you can use it as a hand-warmer
- Message function (displays a short message on the surface like a post-it note; this can be sent to the paperweight via text message)
- Nightlight function
- Maybe a copy and paste function too where it would photograph whatever words it is sitting on top of, and could then paste those same words onto another piece of paper (this would require a special type of e-paper)
- Orrery function (the paperweight rotates like the Earth and also displays the relative position of the moon and sun)
If you think of any others, simply download them from the internet. Finally, the paperweight has regained its respect and earned a place in the 21st century.
[link]
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what, praytell, is it weighing down in the 21st
century? |
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Considering the relentless march of technology, I
want to see a Meissner effect paperweight. |
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Surely the 21st century paperweight is not an object of static mass, but contains a small particle accelerator which moves particles sufficiently close to light speed that they begin to gain mass, so the 'weight' has a 'heavy / light' switch. |
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Message, nightlight and hologram function would be
combined. I propose that Princess Leia might be
the hologram avatar for the message delivery
system. I suspect hand warmer function would take
care of itself. |
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//what, praytell, is it weighing down in the 21st century?// |
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As tablets, ibooks, and e-paper get lighter and lighter, they might blow away unless you have an i-paperweight to hold them down. |
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What's wrong with using a live WWII Mills grenade as a
paperweight? Beauty and functionality in one neat little
package, plus you can use it to open beer bottles and knock nails
in. |
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Best of all, if visitors to your office outstay their welcome, picking
it up and playing catch with it is remarkably effective at
persuading them to leave. |
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Here is the perfect zero-gravity paperweight for space travel. (Can Schrödinger's Paperweight be far behind?) [+] |
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