Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.

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iFaux'n 5

Cheap yet useful chic.
  (+2)
(+2)
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Closely resembling the latest fruity must-have du jour, a universal-remote that also integrates a beer opener, FM radio and single-LED flashlight. Open it up and there's a notepad and one of those next-to-useless tiny pencils, plus room to store a number of "buy 5 get 1 free" cards that are never in your pocket when you go back to the shop.

$1.50 + applicable taxes.

In answer to [MaxwellBuchanan]'s plaint "If only the iPhone 5 had an infrared LED..."

FlyingToaster, Sep 26 2012

http://www.google.c...AQ&biw=1024&bih=543 [2 fries shy of a happy meal, Sep 26 2012]

Meh http://www.youtube....ure=player_embedded
No one REALLY knows what iFaux'n they've got. [theleopard, Sep 27 2012]

[link]






       [+]   

       There should also be an iSwiss Army Knife - all the blades, fish-scalers, retractable wineglasses and screwtweezers in the 1:6:10 form-factor.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 26 2012
  

       // the 1:6:10 form-factor //   

       An odd choice … everywhere else in the Alpha Quadrant, 1:4:9 is the "must have" look …
8th of 7, Sep 26 2012
  

       1:4:9 is so passé.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 26 2012
  

       //Infrared emitting diode...IED? Hmm... combining an iPhone with an IED. Do let's.//   

       Baked. [link]   

       ^ I was thinking of tying in to the EMF opaque cellphone cover: send the assassinatee an iPhone: then when the signal becomes available you know where they are.
FlyingToaster, Sep 26 2012
  
      
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