Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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chocolate conkers game

for deprived Australians.
 
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apparently Australians don’t have much in the way of horse chestnut trees and so have not a clue about the noble art of conkers. well, someone did suggest this might be a bit of a lie because they are totally rubbish at the game but hey, I believe them

I propose to market a box of chocolate shaped conkers (dark, milk and white) in a box with lengths of string and a set of instructions.

it’s a crying shame that aussie kids have been deprived for so long.

po, Oct 27 2003

No Aussies yet, got Mexico though... http://www.ffconkers.org/indexz.htm
[Shz, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

the link that inspired this.. http://www.happyperson.org/conkers.html
[po, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

[link]






       You could use chocolate orange technology.
DrCurry, Oct 27 2003
  

       "Australians...not a clue about the noble art of conkers"
I seem to find myself in the company of Aussies.
half, Oct 27 2003
  

       hey, we can ship them all over the world. spread the news, conkers are coming.
po, Oct 27 2003
  

       Note: Baking and/or Pickling of this product is strongly discouraged.
phoenix, Oct 27 2003
  

       WHAT IS A CONKER!!! I'm afraid this is a worldwide ignorance of the term/idea/product, because Mexico seems to have been left out as well. Are we REALLY missing out?
Pericles, Oct 27 2003
  

       I vote we feed Pericles a line of hokum about conkers being a children's game involving breaking other kid's nuts, and see if she swallows it. Oh, hi, Pericles!
DrCurry, Oct 27 2003
  

       break my lovely choccies, nah! smash em to bits..   

       half, your original anno was funnier :)
po, Oct 27 2003
  

       Muahahahaha! <link>
Shz, Oct 27 2003
  

       There are some entertainingly poor French-to-English translations on that site you linked, Shz. "This game of English origin begins seriously to reach whole Europe thanks to an enormous mediatization for some years."
krelnik, Oct 27 2003
  

       Australian Rules Conkers - now's there's a concept to toy with...
DrCurry, Oct 27 2003
  

       frozen aussie numbnuts? I'm going to pay for this!
po, Oct 27 2003
  

       "Australian Rules Conkers"
Full contact conkers?
phoenix, Oct 27 2003
  

       We used to use gumnuts. They're pretty much indestructible, which I think added something to the game. I think it prepared us for the Australian political environment - petty, primitive, pointless and involving a lot of string.
Detly, Oct 27 2003
  

       You are mean [Curry]... MEAN! If you keep playing with my mind that way I will have to ask [po] to mail me a conker to break your nuts... cause that's what they're for, right? (conkers, obviously) ;)
Pericles, Oct 27 2003
  

       Tried the link po. I managed to get to a sixer with a hardness of 1080. Surely no Australian could match that?
DrBob, Oct 28 2003
  

       UB: no, I think that came from having nannies and going to boarding school too young.
DrCurry, Oct 28 2003
  

       what combination gives that hardness? I think I got 800 tops..
po, Oct 31 2003
  

       Well, I got 1080 but can't get the game to work. How do you take a swing?
egbert, Oct 31 2003
  

       when you have chosen your opponent, you use the up arrow to set the thing/box/setting - top left (its gone off my screen now) as far to the right as poss. and your down arrow to set the thing/box/setting - top right as close to the centre as possible. and then viola, you are off.
po, Oct 31 2003
  

       I did that, but viola, nothing happened.   

       Ah. It's working now, and yay, I won!
egbert, Oct 31 2003
  

       po, second biggest conker, dark, vinegar, bake.
DrBob, Oct 31 2003
  

       Go through the hardness stages, pick an oponent and then watch the two bars at the top. Using the up arrow on your keyboard, try to stop the strength bar when it is at the right hand side (i.e. the strongest). using the down arrow on your keyboard, try to stop the accuracy bar when it's in the middle (i.e. bullseye). Your conker will then be swung.
squeak, Oct 31 2003
  

       eggy, you set your power and your accuracy? you need to do it on each swipe of the conker. you get three go's. cheat - choose victim, I mean opponent bottom right first then the one next to him..thanks bob, I will try that.
po, Oct 31 2003
  

       Having recently returned from down there i can honestly say its a good job..yet another bloody sport for them to get into..pffzz
skinflaps, Oct 31 2003
  

       I can visualize these devils
po, Oct 31 2003
  

       /dark, vinegar, bake/   

       Is this some new form of mfd?
egbert, Oct 31 2003
  

       Depends on whether or not you like that sort of thing.
half, Nov 01 2003
  

       I'm not into ninesy's.
k_sra, Nov 01 2003
  

       oh don't you just love it when UnaBugga feigns ignorance...
po, Nov 02 2003
  
      
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