h a l f b a k e r yWarm and Fussy
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Ladies fashion handbag (US: purse) divided
into two compartments. First is normal, to contain lipstick, condoms, etc. Second contains waterproof bag, anchored to the mouth of the handbag, and appropriately folded to fit inconspicuously within. When the owner feels the need to vomit while on the tube
(FR: metro) late at night after excessive drinking, she opens the second compartment, and operates a discrete ripcord mechanism, which opens the bottom of the handbag and permits the spew bag to unfold below. She then applies her mouth to the spew bag appeture. The vomit is thus safely and hygenically contained, and much embarrasment avoided. The used bag is then removed, tied off (ties supplied) and deposited in a receptacle provided by the transport authority for the purpose. A year's supply of replacement spew bags would be provided.
[link]
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Great idea, but what would you suggest for guys to use? |
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get a girlfriend with a vomit handbag |
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The question has been asked: what about the guys? Well, setting aside for a moment the (rather sexist) fact that real blokes can hold their beer, a Vomit Briefcase is the obvious answer. This works on a slightly different principle. Again, two compartments are used. The spew bag is accessed by opening the case at the opposite side to usual (ie the side opposite to the handle). An auxilliary set of hinges facilitates this. The case is opened to an angle of approx 60 degrees, forming a prism shape. The spew bag is designed to cap off the triangular 'ends' of the prism, to prevent spillage. When vomitting is complete, provided it was not too copious, the case may be closed up, and the contents emptied out upon reaching home. A reasonably sized briefcase should be able to contain 3 normal vomits before needing emptying, although it would be unwise to neglect this task for too long. A discrete gauge on the case would indicate the remaining capacity. |
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how many replacement bags make up a years supply i have freinds who could get through 2 a week and others who would only need 2 a year as for myself im normally a morning after vomiter and theres often a bathroom nearby unless its one of those driving in to work moments |
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Really practical - but I find the vomiting into other people's beds and leaving technique cheaper, and you don't have to bother about disposal or cleaning up
- most effective with strangers or people you really never want to see again, unless they can be persuaded they did the vomiting |
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Guys could wear fanny packs with this installed. Or they could just puke on the streets like God intended. |
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You know, if you're plastered enough to vomit, it's entirely likely you'll use the wrong compartment, if you care enough at that point to use your bag/case at all. Worse still is the morning after: "Hmm...I don't remember packing casserole for lunch."| — | nick_n_uit,
Jan 21 2001, last modified Jan 29 2001 |
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Great Idea - I'll buy one. A friend of mine just ruined a briefcase doing exactly this - she could have used the "VomBag" |
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good idea. but if youre drunk, whats the chance that youll find the right compartment? |
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Oh, a handbag made to vomit into, not a handbag made of vomit. Drat. |
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I believe this idea could be baked a bit further...there have been times when I've needed to pee in the car and it's excruciating (heavy cafe drinker, yu kno). I could envision a contortion where the vomit bag could be used for this type of relief. I guess poop could also be done but would be somewhat awkward...may as well just go in the bushes... |
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