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At last the mystery of the what goes on
inside
the devilish instrument can be revealed
with
the introduction of the new Transparent
Bagpipe.
Made of a super-soft, but tough clear
plastic, that
perfectly immitates the behavour of
the bagpipe's more traditional cousin,
the
transparency
finally exposes to all, the
previously
secret action of the hidden, treacle
infested,
wheezing lungs of this arcane apparatus.
Kilt for Po
http://www.telegrap...F05%2Fefkilt05.html
See guy in the center [kbecker, Sep 03 2007]
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Annotation:
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What happens when the RSPCA figure out that the pipes are powered by a choir of tribbles? |
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What *does* go on inside? And will the bagpiper be wearing a transparent kilt as wel? |
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I'd vote for silent bagpipes. |
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As interesting the internal workings of the pipes may be, it is quite likely that a set in use will contain more than its fair share of spit and lungdew - not necessarily a pretty sight (something that might also be said for the contents of a Scotsman's kilt) |
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I remember being in the school orchestra and watching the wind instrumentalists empty their instruments into a bucket after the performance (though, it may have just been the brass section) |
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[po], I think you may have prompted the answer to "What do scotsmen wear under their kilts?"
Answer: Transparent underwear |
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But nowt goes on inside the bag. It’s just a bag/bellows from which the air is squeezed out down the drone pipes and chanter. |
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All you’d see is air going in and out and air is, well, also transparent. Perhaps if the player were to blow coloured smoke in it would be interesting. |
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//But nowt goes on inside the bag//
You've been fooled and deceived by
Scotch Mist. There's lungs in there I tell
you - groaning, moaning, wailing,
droning, wheezing lungs, (well there are
in the transparent version) and now the
secret's out! |
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**trite amurikn sentiment alert* I gave a - but only because I would miss the beauty of the bags.
*t.a.s.a* |
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are we still talking about pipes? |
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The bag of the bagpipe is opaque for a reason and the reason is related to the multi-functionality of the bagpipes. As a whole unit, the bagpipes are a musical instrument, yes. But the bagpipe bag is, in fact, also an incubation chamber for the haggis, where up to nine of the newborn beasties are kept warm and damp and are lulled to sleep by the gentle skirl of the instrument, until such time as they are a large enough to burst, face-hugger like, from the bag, to scurry away into the sheeptracks through the purpling September heather. |
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I knew [calum] would explain matters clearly. |
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nine of witch beasties calum? |
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little haggae? sheep? I'm so confused. |
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confused?...but beautifully so. |
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I've seen a transparent clarinet. Treacle infested is right - and bagpipes must be ten times worse, with a sump instead of a drain at the bottom. |
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Irish Uilleann pipes would be better if you find treacle infestation a bit hard to take - the air in them doesn't come from the innards of a Scotsman - nor from the innards of an Irishman nor woman, neither. |
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It's tartan, lass, tartan! |
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Would like to say this idea wouldn't work in an iron lung, but bastard bagpipes probably would. |
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but plaid is clean and unslimey from any creatures growing on them. it. apparently |
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