The Stalemorphic Taco Shell

So it's a well established fact that I like tacos. But I hate it when I try to make a soft taco, and find that the taco bread, which has been sitting on my shelf for a month, has become crusty and hard. Likewise, I hate to find that my hard taco shells have become soft. There has to be a happy medium here. Well, now there is! The solution is to manufacture taco shell material which becomes stale even faster than normal. That way, it can start out as a soft taco, but a week later, I have a hard taco shell to work with. Wait another week, and my hard taco has become stale and has reverted back to its soft taco form. Do you see what I'm getting at here? Perpetual taco bliss! Now, I know there may be some naysayers out there. "What if I want a hard taco, but I'm living in a soft taco week?? What then? Huh? Huh??" To them, I say: buy a second pack of Stalemorphic tacos, a week out of synch with the first pack! That way, you will have the correct taco shell for any occasion, and taco shell shame (TSS) will become a thing of the past. We can eliminate TSS in our lifetime!