Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Like gliding backwards through porridge.

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SmellShield

 If holding your breath just doesn't suffice.
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This consists of two tubes connected to the nose (they do not have to be that big) and noseplugs connected to these tubes which normally allow breathing because they are open in standard mode. When you encounter an atmosphere which could double as a respiratory poison (Tokyo during the rush hour, your bedroom after you and your partner both had a big Chili con Carne), it supplies you with a small amount of oxygen stored in a bottle not bigger than a pack of cigarettes in the pocket of your shirt. This would, of course, only hold some minutes, but it doesn't have to be fully clean air that you breathe, just mixed with bottled air to be clean enough that you do not turn blue(or green, depending on the nature of the pollutant) after breathing the air.
—Saruman, Jun 14 2002

Personal Air Filter http://www.hawaiian...ay/innovations.html
"Protect your health and voice from re-circulated air in planes & other toxic airborne environments" [phoenix, Jun 15 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

The "ORIGINAL" Air Supply ® http://www.naturals...s1.com/airsupl1.htm
"There are Three (3) Original Air Supply ® Models To Choose From: Air Supply ®AS1500, Air Supply ®AS500 and the TINIEST Wearable Air Purifier Available Today, the Air Supply ® AS150MM" [phoenix, Jun 15 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

The other 10,000 Google hits http://www.halfbake...rsonal +air +filter
for +miniature +personal +air +filter [phoenix, Jun 15 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

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       Why not just a filter?
—phoenix, Jun 15 2002
   

       Here's what you do: take two cigarettes and whack the filters off-em. Now squish the filters tighter and stuff them in your nose. Think about this: you're actually using cigarettes to breathe easier.
—RayfordSteele, Jun 15 2002
   

       Well, the problem with filters is that they only filter out one particular sort of smell - only car fumes, or only smoke, and I have never seen one that protects against farts, for example. If you could switch on an auxillary storage of clean air, you could protect yourself against all these smells, without having to wear meter - long filters which protect against every possible gas
—Saruman, Jun 20 2002
   

       This might be helpful for people with no choice but to use outhouses. Just put it on and you've got a few minutes of odor-free shitting. For allowing me to use the words "odor-free shitting," I give you a croissant.
—polartomato, Jun 20 2002
   


 

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