Shower o' Doom

I have occasionally seen shower alarms upon my travels. They usually take the form of a cord that you pull to start a timer. When the timer is up, a light flashes or a buzzer sounds and you know that x minutes have elapsed and you ought to get out.

The trouble is, I am normally too engrossed in the delivery of my world-humbling rendition of "I am the very Model of a Modern Major-General" to notice the alarm and thus I turn up to my next engagement flustered and late.

To solve this problem, I put forth a (this) design for the non-ignorable Shower o' Doom alarm. The actuator for the alarm timer is a pressure sensor built into the floor of the shower. When the showeree steps into the cabinet the timer starts and the fun begins.

Spikes emerge from the walls and ceiling of the cabinet. They're made of soft rubber so they won't really cause any harm, but their slow advance is still sufficiently creepy to excite dread. At the same time, a rousing musical score, strikes up (the Indiana Jones theme, or something from Erik Korngold's score to "The Adventures of Robin Hood" are recommendations).

Imagine the sensation of triumph as you leap from the spiky shower in the nick of time. Sliding across the floor you realize you've left your favourite Shower Fedorah behind. You lurch across the bathroom, dive for the shower, and manage to yank it out just as the spikes snap shut. Congratulations! You've made it out of another shower on time, proud morning hero!

If you should ever fail and a spike hits you, the shower door will lock, the water will turn icy cold and you'll be subjected to a random screech from Celine Dion's back catalogue. Mwa ha ha ha!