Self-statue

Three facts as a starting point: 1. All houses in suburbia look a like, difficult to find your destination. 2. 3D printing still hasn't reached the consumer's market. 3. There is the tradition at weddings to make a photo of the couple.

In an image-rich world where people like to see themselves as special, unique and famous, let them raise a statue for themselves as newly weds in their front yard. With statues depicting the household in every front yard in suburbia, it is much easier to find your way around.

You call for directions and the wife replies: "So nice of you guys to come visit us! It has been since our marriage since we've last seen you!" You: "How do we get to your place?" The wife: "Not so difficult. Did you hear about that artist/wannabe serial killer with a giant statue in his front yard and dozens of women face down scattered around? You take a right turn after that and when you see the mixed gay couple you take a left turn. You will recognise us easily. Both our neighbours have five kids and we have none. And our statue is still not painted either. He is such a nerd, he didn't like the paint the statue would get at the printer, so he intends to paint himself. He still didn't get to doing it! It has been two years already!" You: "You know... perhaps we should postpone our visit just a little more then?" the Wife: "And you what they did to the statue of our neighbour? He started working in an abortion clinic recently and..." You: "Hello? Are you listening? We are not coming!"

The statues can become a status icon, the more detail, the more expensive. The children get a new statue for their birthday. Instead of a photo album with pictures of their youth, you can store a whole gallery of 18 statues in the attic. When they go to college they bring their statue to put in the hall way of the dormitory next to their door. These statues are stolen and found back tied to other statues. You can organise demonstrations against something on campus, just by putting the statues together. Most statues are destroyed by the end the owner graduates (a ritual can be invented for that). Once you marry and go live in the suburbs you get a new statue.

A bit about the technology to make the statues. Perhaps you know those decorative square surfaces in which you can place your hand or face and the imprint of it translates into little iron sticks that are moved forward. The same idea, but then smaller sticks and integrated in a man size puppet. A laser beam scans the shape of the person to be portrayed and a computer calculates how much the little sticks on the surface of the dummy should be moved (hydraulically). Then a plastic blanket is thrown against the puppet which assumes its shape. This plastic becomes solid and the same is repeated from the back side. The two molds are glued together and you are done! Everybody would want one!

It will also be a lot of fun in case of a divorce or other circumstances. The statues will be run over, shot down, kidnapped or similar things. Better have this happen to the image of yourself than to you physically. You can imagine that a mistress wanting recognition ties some of her lingerie around the neck of the statue.