h a l f b a k e r ycarpe demi
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People for Eating Tasty Animals are indeed appreciative. |
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I can hear it now: "Hee-haw hee-haw why am I hanging from a string and covered in festive tissue paper? Also, why am I so much smaller than other members of my species?" |
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I'll give no croissant for teaching kids to wail on animals. [-] |
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But here's that n-thing: ñ |
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I think it would be quite disturbing, but then you don't see too many Piñatae around these parts. |
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//you don't see too many Piñatae around// I think they've got a captive breeding pair at London Zoo. |
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as long as it's human screams, not animal screams that would be disturburbing. |
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Perhaps the screaming could wane whimperwards towards the end of its life as a container of candy and, when downed from the treebranch and thoroughly whipped to bits by tartrazined children, the voicebox can squelch out a beseeching "kill me... aananaghghgh". |
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One could have this built into the stick, which would emit huge crushing noises, explosions, wet splattering bursts, and similar on contact with pinata, partytgoer or anything else. A range of sounds would be possible. One stick would be good for many pinatas, and even good without pinatas. |
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How about a compromise - the piñata taunts the stick wielder. There would be several modes ranging from "gentle" for young kids ("aww, you missed") to "harsh" for older kids ("you're going to have to try harder than that") to "vulgar" for even older kids ("try again, you %^$#@"). |
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It would taunt only after the kid has swung his/her stick. Sensors (infrared?) could detect the motion. |
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//Doesn't this make it a bit too easy for blind-folded kids to locate the target// |
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That's the Whimpering Piñata you're thinking of. |
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I go away for a day to look for gainful employment, (huh,
what the hell is gainful employment?), and this disgusting,
perverse, unbelievably cruel and mean spirited idea arises. |
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I will never go away and look for work again. I love it. 5
buns from me. |
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Perhaps a Black Knight pinata could taunt you as you smash it, "... it's only a flesh wound!" |
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