RJR Smokulator 5000

If you've traveled to Las Vegas for business or pleasure, there's one little detail we bet you haven't missed: the sweet scent of cigarette smoke that pervades every room in Sin City's finest hotels.

Thank the Smokulator 5000.

Not only does it deliver more than 5000 cubic feet per minute of the divine draft of decadence, it does so with the most inexpensive tobacco products on the market: the sticks, stems and other byproducts that RJR would never dream of including in our world-famous tobacco products.

The Smokulator 5000's exclusive delivery system continuously loads patented mini-bales into the smoke chamber. There, a computer-driven ignition and combustion control systems combine to ensure a slow, sultry burn for a constant supply of concentrated aroma.

Certified installation technicians will interface the Smokulator 5000 to your building's HVAC system.

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This posting is a fictionalized, satirical publication. Its content should in no way be interpreted as a factual description of any person, place, time, product or service. Names used in this posting are either fictional and intended to be construed as fictional, except in the case of well-known persons (legal or biological) who are being subjected to satire.