h a l f b a k e r y"Put it on a plate, son. You'll enjoy it more."
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I hate being lied to. Doesn’t every one? I propose to fashion pants with a mini-polygraph machine sewn into the lining to assess each statement for truth that the wearer speaks. If the polygraph machine detects a lie, wires in the seat of the pants would ignite and catch the pants on fire revealing
the liar to everyone as he runs down the street stopping, dropping and rolling.
The severity of the ignition to the pants would vary according to the size of the lie.
This new fashion would be particularly useful in the penal system too!
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WIBNI. Lie detectors are so inaccurate (and require calibration and a skilled operator to get any meaningful result), that the first time you were under stress your drawers would go up in a plume of smoke. And for that, fishbone. |
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-- Does my bum look big in this?
-- No dear (smoke rises)
-- Huh. My bum may be fat, but yours is on fire! |
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what if you just got a small electric shock? so if you were under stress you would get a shock to focus your mind, or if your heart was beating a little faster because you were near your honey, you would get a little shock that would, um, excite you more (I don't know, I've just heard about these things - some might say it sounds rather twisted - I'm reserving judgement), and then the lie-detector aspect is a bit by-the-by really. But this is 'bakeable' isn't it? even if not exactly valuable or meaningful or sellable. |
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huh, guess no one's been polygrpahed here then.... |
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I'm an advocate of penalties that facilitate reintigration of offenders into society, so...What about a little extinguisher to put out the fire when the perpetrator has redeemed him/herself? Looking like you've peed your pants may not be much of a fashion statement, but going forward with your idea would be a great source of entertainment. Kind of puts a new twist on "Fun Fashions." |
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I've sat for numerous polygraphs and I don't think I'd like them any better knowing my pants might flare up if I sneeze. |
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What were you in for? M_u_r_d_e_r? |
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Oh, I thought it was an indicator as to whether the wine was capable of getting you drunk. |
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