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Perpetually Mobile Stationery Cupboard

Pedants rejoice!
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Inspired by Pedant Signs.

A quick search on Google reveals many "mobile stationery cupboards" but I have yet to find one without a fatal flaw.

If, at any point, the cupboard is stationary, sloppy labellers can use the excuse that their incorrect labelling is perfectly correct.

I therefore propose a stationery cupboard that never stops moving; ever.

Clearly, it would have to have its own power source as well as AI capabilities to ensure that it can absolutely never be stopped by a cunning but sloppy labeller. But these are of course minor technical hurdles as we strive for ...

DenholmRicshaw, May 13 2002

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       Could we have an orbiting stationery cupboard that fires pencils at you from outer space?
pottedstu, May 13 2002
  

       [pottedstu] As long as the pencils were pre-sharpened, or they would burn up on re-entry.
brewmaster, May 14 2002
  

       Hmmm, this has just become tricky.   

       (Remembers Physics)   

       The frame of reference is important here.   

       Strictly speaking a "stationary stationery cupboard" should be:   

       "Stationary, with respect to the frame of reference of the building, stationery cupboard".   

       Since everything is relative then I suppose this means that the word stationary can never be used by itself.   

       (Promptly forgets Physics)
DenholmRicshaw, May 14 2002
  

       My daughter has several mobiles which have decorated her room at one time or another, but have fallen out of favour and been taken down. Could she, perhaps, be provided with a secure, stable and above all stationary storage facility for these?
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 15 2007
  

       She needs a stationary stationary mobile cupboard.   

       Heaven help us if some bright spark starts selling these mobiles as office equipment.   

       Stationary stationary mobile stationery cupboard.
DenholmRicshaw, Mar 16 2007
  

       I actually have some headed notepaper depicting such a cupboard, Denholm, for the purposes of advertising. I would normally be delighted to send you a sample of my stationary stationary mobile stationery cupboard stationery, but unfortunately I have lost the key to the stationary stationary mobile stationery cupboard stationery cupboard.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 16 2007
  

       //stationary stationary mobile stationery cupboard stationery cupboard// And then it's turtles all the way down?
methinksnot, Mar 16 2007
  

       Imagine my surprise on a recent visit to a stationery shop in Mobile, Alabama.   

       I looked in a corner to see the Mobile stationer's stationary stationary mobile stationery cupboard stationery cupboard.   

       They've lost their key too.
DenholmRicshaw, Mar 16 2007
  

       *round of applause*
calum, Mar 16 2007
  
      
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