h a l f b a k e r yI CAN HAZ CROISSANTZ?
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In the summer time, I like to wear sandals, but I also insist on wearing socks. This unfortunately attracts the attention and derision of the fashion police. (some of whom are my actual work colleagues)
The solution is of course to wear Perfect Manly Feet socks.
Made from the finest of natural
materials, Perfect Manly Feet socks slip over your otherwise gnarled and buckled toes, replacing them with a vision of pedicured perfection.
In order to ensure a perfect match for your existing leg colour and hair density, Perfect Manly Feet socks have to be individually manufactured, based on detailed scans of your ankles and feet.
Sun reacting dyes enable the socks to tan realistically, so that they remain undetectable over the summer period. (short were I live)
Also available for women. (painted toes and fake tattoos are extra)
No where near manly enough.
http://www.unionfiv...vs/socksFeetWht.jpg
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jul 05 2009]
not manly at all
http://www.boingboi...7/08/25/cruggs.html
[jaksplat, Jul 05 2009]
[link]
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You could go the other way and have "Trollsocks"... |
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This so far surpasses gross that it must be good. |
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I think the answer to your problem, xenzag, is to wear an accompanying kimono and paired swords. I don't think too many people poked fun at samurai for wearing socks and sandals in combination.
Footnote: Just spent 10 minutes researching Japanese socks in the hope of finding a decent link. Didn't come up with anything appropriate but that's because I got a bit sidetracked. The Japanese seem very keen on their socks, and you've got to love them for it! |
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[+] but I wear socks/sandals too and don't really care about criticism for it |
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I do too, but the fashion police can be very cruel. Having said that, sometimes I deliberately wear unmatching socks just to wind them up even more. |
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OK - scary demographics of the HB poking out here like a poorly pedicured, hook-nailed big toe through unravelling polyester |
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Sock/sandal combo ... why??? What's the appeal?? |
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I like bare feet. But I understand the need for a sole. In terms of attaching the sole, early humans came up with 2 basic models. a) minimalist or b) ecompassing (for use in case of cold weather, waterproofing, or if extra structural solidity is needed) |
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The sock, likewise, evolves for the new shoed environment - a) to absorb damp & sweat that can no longer simply evaporate away, b) to provide additional warmth |
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NEITHER are required if you are wearing sandals - unless there is some strange from of Inuit sandal designed for sub-zero operation only in conjunction with suitable sealskin socks? |
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/\
.I.
.I.
.I.Fashion prosecutor. (+) |
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Eeewwweeeyyyy goooeeeyyy 2 fries. |
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//OK - scary demographics of the HB poking out here
like a poorly pedicured, hook-nailed big toe through
unravelling polyester// HEY I resemble that remark! |
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// Inuit sandal designed for sub-zero operation only in conjunction with suitable sealskin socks? // |
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You've led a very sheltered life, haven't you, [kindachewy] ? You need to get out more, and meet people your own age, and look at their footwear .... |
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[+]
I'll get a pair for my dad... |
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But, wouldn't your ankles look all swelled up? Because, I mean, the sock's gotta end (or is it starting...) somewhere... |
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They must look funny when they start to wear out...double toes! Wait, I think I just grossed myself out... |
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+ (but is that your real foot [21] ?) |
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Could you put a notch in the Manly Feet next to the big toe to enable flip-flop compatibility? |
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Real men don't wear shoes. Or sandals. This could be taken to its logical conclusion by sewing soles into the PMF and doing away with the sandals altogether. [+] |
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//Sock/sandal combo ... why??? What's the appeal?? //
for cool weather, also the socks absorb sweat better (depends on what kind of sandal) and can cushion against strap-wear in long walks. |
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Nice idea but it's a lot of work. A simpler solution that works just as well is: cut the ends off your socks to let your toes stick out. You still have sock coverage over all the parts of your foot that might rub against the sandal (resulting in improved walking comfort), but a casual observer might not realize you're sporting the dorky socks-with-sandals look. Take my word for it, you'll look tres suave! |
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/gnarled and buckled toes/ |
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You have got manly feet, I reckon. What you need are transparent socks. Pedicure? Man? Men walk around in ill-fitting boots, kick things that are displeasing, have heavy stuff fall on their feet, curse, pick the heavy things back up, soldier on. Snakes bite their feet but lose a fang in the gnarl. The feet catch fire but then go out because there is not much oxygen. A toe is missing, from mowing the lawn while drunk many years ago. Those perfect manly feet hurt, but the man does not complain (except to his wife, and only to the point where he is threatened with seeing a health professional). I am talking here about Manly feet that are on the bottom of Men. |
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//I am talking here about Manly feet that are on the bottom of Men// |
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These men have got feet on their butts?
Are they theirs (as in extreme thalidomidism) or someone else's (as in homosexual foot fetishism)? |
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Both slightly disturbing ... |
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They've got feet down below their knees. Hold you in their armchair you can feel their disease. |
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