h a l f b a k e r yThe phrase 'crumpled heap' comes to mind.
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The point system is as follows:
Point value = R *
SUM (d_n*s_n^(s_n)) + R*g where
R= aspect ratio of the stone's dimesion normal
to its largest projected planar area divided by its
largest planar area dimension, (thus a perfectly
flat stone would be worth less than a round one
that
is more difficult to skip.
d_n= {d1, d2, d3...etc} are distances skipped per
impact after initial impact
s_n= {s1, s2, s3...etc} are the skip number
disregarding the initial impact.
g=glide distance, if a stone is judged to be not
leaving the water at a certain point.
Thus a 5 skipper would be worth more than an
equidistant 2 skip, unless the 2 skip were a much
harder aspect ratio. Weight factors would be
considered also somehow.
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Annotation:
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What about water surface conditions, and wind ? Or would it be indoors, in a pool ? Rowing, kayaking and other disciplines accept prevailing conditions. |
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I think you will find folks would prefer the competition to
be simplified by using a "standardized skipping stone". It
will have a particular shape and mass. Since there are
standard baseballs, standard basketballs, standard soccer
balls, and so on, this would seem perfectly reasonable. |
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And we do have the technology to make standard stones by
melting rock dust, for example. |
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I think having various standardized sizes and shapes
marked with
the different points they're worth would be
interesting. Heavier would have a larger number for
instance. |
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Alternatively, contestants could be given a bag of 10 random stones, making the contest more "real world". |
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Presumably the event would rapidly diverge into different dsciplines - 'four each of standard small, medium and large', 'random freestyle', 'tiny discus', 'the seven odd shapes', etc. |
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You could also have them all be one standard shape
but varied weights requiring the player to judge his
throw accordingly. |
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You know, you could have special pools with numbers laid
out at various locations. The skipper could toss it and try to
hit multiple numbers for a higher score than the next guy. |
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Have them laid out in a pattern such that it's fairly easy to
hit say, 4 ones in a row but to hit higher numbers you'd have
to hit a tricky pattern. |
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You could even have negative numbers around the higher
numbers. Shoot for that five but it's surrounded by -3s. |
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Explosions. You need explosions. If the stones were made from elements
from the left side of the periodic table then they would explode when they
skipped, ensuring a wider viewing audience. Larger stones would last
through repeated skips. |
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Beautiful. Reminds me of my brothers and me at the creek
where I grew up. |
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//You couldn’t have that big water they had in films
in the ’60s.// |
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No, but you could use that curvey water they use in
movies about surfing. The slow-motion type would
be ideal. |
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Great name for a horrible jazz fusion album from the
70s. |
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Sorry about being redundant there. |
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// my brothers and me at the creek where I grew up. // |
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Was that before someone kissed you and you turned into a princess ...? |
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You are nothing but the wart on my frogs ass, you butt head.
Ha. Take that. |
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I think that was 8th's way of telling you you're a
princess without giving you a swelled ego. |
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//You are nothing but the wart on my frogs ass, you
butt head. Ha. Take that.// |
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pnctn.: frog's
hypntn: butt-head |
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No, you are wrong. I meant I have a "frogs ass"! As in frog ass
like. |
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That would work with multiple frogs that were
sharing a single ass, but it would still need an
apostrophe at the end. Referring to a single frog's
ownership of an ass would use an apostrophe then
the
s. |
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So you might say: "Is it the frog's ass? No, it's the
frogs' ass. They all saved up and bought one
together." |
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Don't feel bad, I still often type "It's" when I mean
the thing
possessing something because a stupid grade
school teacher taught it to us wrong. By the time I
figured out she had taught me wrong, it
was already burrowed into my brain and it still
pops out when I'm typing fast and not
concentrating. |
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Example: "What's that?" "It's the frog's ass." "What's
ass?" "It's Its ass." |
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