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Impale Cooking

 As fast as frying, but as "healthy" as baking
  (+15)(+15)
(+15) 		  [vote for,
against]

Here's the problem: say you want to cook something fast, but healthy, and the microwave makes the food (such as chicken strips) kind of soggy. In comes the Impale Cooker.

The idea is to have a cooking device that simply impales the food item(s) with sharp, skinny metal spikes inside a container, like a miniature oven. Then, heat up this mini oven and the spikes to the desired temperature, such as a common 350 degrees F as recommended for fried foods. The result will be food cooked oven quality, but at the speed of frying.

This device obviously wouldn't replace a fryer, nor an oven, but could be a nice complement to those devices.

—aboell, Jun 24 2006

Spud spikes http://www.asktoolt.../potato-spikes.html
[ldischler, Jun 24 2006]

(?) Infernal cooker with spike retraction. http://upload.wikim...en_of_Nuremberg.jpg
[ldischler, Jun 25 2006]

Impala Cooker http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impala
Would keep you fit - assuming you had to go out and catch one of these before using it. [zen_tom, Jun 26 2006]

"Set it and forget it" http://www.ronco.com
The Ronco Showtime Rotisserie [Freefall, Jun 26 2006]

(?) http://media.putfile.com/Electric-Sausage http://media.putfile.com/Electric-Sausage
Cooking a sausage on a fork using mains electricity [monojohnny, Jun 27 2006]

[link]






       Long ago, I tried to use a hotdog cooker that had stubby spikes for each end of the frankfurter. It ran electric current through the sausages, and scared the heck out of me.   

       You have pretty much described the Ronco Rotisserie.
—baconbrain, Jun 24 2006
   

       Isn't this just a motorized fire spit?
—Gallus, Jun 24 2006
   

       That's what I thought at first, too, but this contraption would have lots and lots of small spikes, not one big one. Think bed of nails, not shish kebab.
—jutta, Jun 24 2006
   

       Oven Maiden.
—Jinbish, Jun 24 2006
   

       It's well established that things cook much quicker if you cook them from the inside as well as out, even in conventional ovens.   

       But if your food was impaled on lots of little spikes, wouldn't it be kinda difficult to get it off once cooked?
—DrCurry, Jun 24 2006
   

       Yes, there's going to need to be a spike retraction feature.
—normzone, Jun 24 2006
   

       Tenderizes, too.
—5th Earth, Jun 25 2006
   

       so if I want to cook some rice I have to impale each individual grain... sighs - better get started now - got friends coming for dinner next week. [+}
—xenzag, Jun 25 2006
   

       It doesn't really compare to frying, since the heat capacity of air is so small compared to oil - oil cooks faster than air at the same temperature (unless you also make this a convection oven). Also, immersion in hot oil leaves food moister, in part by replacing lost moisture with yummy oil.
—gregor-e, Jun 25 2006
   

       I'm imagining a George Forman Grill with about a eight hundred little spikes total (that's 20x20 per side if my quick math is right).
—BJS, Jun 25 2006
   

       I remember one of those hot dog cookers that [baconbrain] mentioned. You stuck each end of the dog onto a spike. They came out yucky, as I like mine with the skin burnt, if I eat one at all.
—xandram, Jun 26 2006
   

       Sounds intriguing - but doesn't piercing food allow juices to escape. What about two heated plates sort of like a large tenderizing mallet - would give lots of surface area against the food - help get the heat in fast, but not let the juices leave.
—trekbody, Jun 26 2006
   

       Impale the food and place it in a small oven, you say?   

       Why does the phrase "Set it and forget it" come to mind? (see link)
—Freefall, Jun 26 2006
   

       Just glanced at this and saw "Impala Cooking". Not a recipe I'm liable to need soon, and if I did, I probably wouldn't be fussy.
—normzone, Jun 26 2006
   

       My guess is that Impala would probably taste something like venison.
—Freefall, Jun 26 2006
   

       Impala tastes like kudu. It's very gamey and you have to tenderise it quite a bit.
—methinksnot, Jun 26 2006
   

       but can you describe the taste of kudu without reverting to a who's on first routine?
—tcarson, Jun 27 2006
   

       I suppose that [Freefall]'s guess is a pretty good description. It wasn't that hard to find in South Africa.
—methinksnot, Jun 27 2006
   

       Great idea ! [+]   

       PS:   

       Check out the sausage link I attached, which isn't the way I would recommend you go with your idea...but looks like great fun.. :-)
—monojohnny, Jun 27 2006
   

       Heh. Sausage link. Heh.
—BunsenHoneydew, Jun 29 2006
   

       This isnt really a new concept, Probably half the people on the planet have a set of aluminum baking nails, or as in the link Spud Spike(as is thier most common usage) I think this is baked.
—jhomrighaus, Jun 29 2006
   
      
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