Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
"My only concern is that it wouldn't work, which I see as a problem."

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.

user:
pass:
register,


       

Hilted Screwtops for Wine

empty bottle and bash it over skull
  (-3)
(-3)
  [vote for,
against]

It's a hollow sword hilt with a threaded insert that screws off the bottle neck when you want a swig, and then back on again so that you can smash the bottle and stabstabby whoever needs a glassing.
Cuit_au_Four, Mar 29 2019

[link]






       You have obviously never engaged in barroom combat.   

       When employing a broken bottle as an edged weapon, the correct technique is to hold it by the base and smash off the neck. As with many other violence-related activities, movies and TV invariably get it wrong, prefering the clichés of theatrical convention to a technically accurate but less dramatic depiction.   

       We can provide free of charge the addresses of several drinking establishments (the majority in Glasgow ) where we can guarantee you a suitablly expeditious education in such matters, and for a small fee a list of recommended reconstructive surgical specialists for when (if) you recover; there's an additional list of funeral directors - that's free, because we get a nice kickback for any trade we drum up for them.   

       Sorry, but [-]; bad and dangerous advice.
8th of 7, Mar 29 2019
  

       I'm probably kissing any chance of running for president (of anything) away by recounting this but I have a bar room fight / broken bottle story.   

       Once upon a time in my youth, a gal got very flirty with me at a bar in San Francisco (at least she looked like a gal). But seriously, she was very pretty and when she asked me to dance we got to talking and then sat down at the bar. So her boyfriend walks up to me and grabs me by the neck to try to choke me, or pick me up hoping I'd beg for mercy or something. I grabbed his hand and twisted it upside down into a painfully uncomfortable position and pinned him to the bar immobilizing him. I'm not some kung fu master, he was shitfaced and being a big dumb jock, probably didn't expect the long haired guy in the leather jacket to be so non compliant.   

       Anyway, we both got kicked out of the bar and as I left I tucked a beer bottle into my jacket just in case. As I walked out, there he was waiting for me with his buddy. I pulled the bottle out holding it in such a way that I obviously intended to use it as a weapon and as I walked by a lamp post, swung the bottle at in in dramatic fashion to create a lethal, jagged edged implement of war. The sound it made as it broke filled the night.   

       TINK!   

       Tink? I looked down and saw that the bottle had neatly severed at just below the neck into two neat pieces, one of which was now completely hidden in my clinched fist. Committed now to go to battle with two big drunk guys with a lipstick tube sized piece of glass in my hand I hid it behind my back and continued on my way, neither approaching them or avoiding them. Evidently they saw that my heart was in the right place and decided to leave me alone.
doctorremulac3, Mar 31 2019
  

       That is an hilarious story, [doc]. Full marks for psychology and calmth under pressure.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 31 2019
  
      
[annotate]
  


 

back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle