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Many Newbies post ideas without truly understanding the Bakery, or how it works. They may not have actually read any of the other ideas, or their annotations.
When a new account is generated, maybe an email should be sent to the new Baker, encapsulating the sort of response they can reasonably expect
(Names dates, times, places and heights have been changed to protect the guilty), viz.:
[Whimiscal, amusing but rather unoriginal idea (with unfunny punning title), posted by relative Newbie. Idea involves cats, custard, punisment of prisoners, genetic engineering, Bluetooth, and for some obscure reason, a pole at the back]
Blessmess: Whimsical touchy-feely applause of cat component.
poop: Complement to Blessmess
ProfessorChilli: Grumpy, bad-tempered and cynical WIBNI accusation.
DigitalBiscuits: calm, sensible intellectual criticism of overall idea.
UnaBlubber: Complement to DigitalBiscuits. Long drawn out philosophical refutation of human-rights-prisoner-punishment aspect.
Weaksquauk: High minded intellectual support for UnaBubba's anno.
7th of 8: Criticism of cat aspect of idea. Standard anti-cat rant. Suggestion for incorporating explosives into the idea. String of equations.
chtgenerous: applause of 7th's explosives suggestion
UnaBlubber: Attack on 7th's morals, parentage and personal hygene habits.
s3toff: "Be nice to each other" anno to try to stop flame war.
Weaksquauk: Attack on 7th's morals, parentage and personal hygene habits. Further gratuitous accusations of unnatural relations with domestic and domesticated animals added.
GardenerJack: Suggestion for powering the "idea" by means of a lighting rod.
Angle: Attack on ProfessorChilli. Several useful links added.
fingeroil: Technical criticism of idea.
NickThatGrates: Slightly off-topic comment, degenerating into rambling.
wetmisery: Gently reproachful comment on Nick's anno.
Fakediamond: Request that idea be available in a bizarre range of colours, materials and surface finishes, preferably mineral in nature.
Mephistophles: Brief anno rubbishing all ideas involving Bluetooth and Genetic Engineering.
DrBlob: Sensible anno on idea. Short anecdote, possibly relevant.
ProfessorChilli: Ill-tempered badmouthing of other HalfBakers.
Aristobottle: Technical criticism of idea. Suggested enhancements. Link added.
northernloveapple: Demand for more custard
Blessmess: Second demand for more custard
poop: Third demand for more custard
column: Request for less custard.
And so on and so on ......
nick's link
http://www.nj2k.co.uk
Use the damn link button: you have no excuse. Not that you should be posting your personal website all the time, that's what your profile page is for. and why the hell should I always be putting up other people's links, etc, etc, grumble grumble.. [yamahito, Aug 30 2002]
The Turing Test
http://cogsci.ucsd....aygin/tt/ttest.html
Can YOU pass it ? [8th of 7, Sep 05 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]
[link]
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But will it be possible to send out these emails with coloured/textured backgrounds? to reflect the way the 'bakery feels about the idea as a collective. |
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Hmm... Bearing in mind that the baker-base is fluid, this'd have to be updated semi-regularly. Plus, not everyone wants to give their emails to strange websites that offer them bread products. |
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6 months later pRayforIron adds an already-explored annotation to the tired idea, rouses the whole discussion up again, and wonders why people read the professor's annotations as badmouthing... |
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The halfbakery reduced to an AI 'bot. Who'd have thunk it were possible? |
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[blissmiss] why was your elf trying to stop you laugh? |
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you missed out hollowmarmalade; spews forth and intensly confusing array of syllables that may/may not have anything to do with the original idea. |
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If the idea doesn't attract too many fishbones, I'll add some other "characters" as time goes on. |
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He's improved a lot recently .... I hope his feelings aren't hurt (much) ...... |
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"Sadly, that information *could* have helped me." |
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You posted a custard idea?! |
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No, I was a newbie. I'm fresh out of custard ideas. |
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XSarenkaX: You're in the Bakery Zone. No-one can help you now .... |
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Har-de-har. Ow, it hurts when I laugh! Yuckity-yuck. |
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And don't forget rhino: [marked-for-extinction] not even the faintest of an idea |
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FarmerJohn: Yep, got that one. Working on some more. I'll edit them in later ... |
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<nearly drowns in custard-filled croissants> |
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Just reading this and thinking: Idea needs more LED and GPS. Should mow lawns too. Custard used to attract ants to killing. Swiss army pole pants. |
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[Zircon] hollamarmalade was hilarious. May I suggest [Holy marmalade!] . Even More colorful. A better fit- has a southern ring to it-part of my background . Marmalade. I like that it has texture-- more syllables than jam. Rolls off the tongue like an ending for a marching band percussion cadence. However, annotating to this creates visual that [7/8ths] is dying a slow death or mentally paraphrasing dog obedience training philosophy, " Ignore undesired behavior long enough-- eventually it will die. |
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I am not sure if you can (or whether I wish to be) pigeon-holed like this. sorry but I don't feel whimsical today. |
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Nick that grates: obscure link to slightly off topic conversation - uses opportunity to promote own idea/website/mother's business... |
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Oh yes! Love your work [8th]. Encore encore... |
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[NicktheGreat] = [StealtheScuttle] |
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By the way, some people think that this is a proposal for an AI autoresponse 'bot for individual users; it's not. It's just an idea for an "example" in the help metafile to show Newbies what they can reasonably expect. |
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A configurable AI autoresponse is a bit WIBNI ..... isn't it ? |
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Are there any real 'Bakers still out there ? |
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I'm real! And, look, I didn't even get pigeon-holed. |
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Next up: All HalfBakers will be required to pass a monthly Turing Test to check they've not been replaced with an AI (except for Zircon, who openly admits to being inorganic). |
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I'm real! Maybe not much of a baker - but real nonetheless. |
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8th of 7: some of us already failed that one. |
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[st3f] I stink, therefore I am. I'll provide more concrete proof when I can. |
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What are we talking about? |
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Now that toast has self-destructed, time to clean the Swiss Cheese |
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Private club? Really? And here I am passing comment, posting ideas without so much a 'by your leave'. Private club you say... in that case... |
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You Ain't Seen Me, Right?! |
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Guess what percentage of halfbakers were Newbies once.
Don't beg for attention by mocking waugsqueke, or deleting annotations or links.
Read the help file and get over your elf. It's not a contest, nor is it a clique - it's supposed to be a respite from jackasses and the wear and tear of our rapidly shrinking braincells. For the most part, we're lovable but gruff. |
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<tip type="Interpersonal Communication/Lubrication">
Moving parts in rubbing contact require lubrication to
avoid excessive wear. Honorifics and formal politeness
provide lubrication where people rub together. Often the very young, the untraveled, the naive, the unsophisticated deplore these formalities as 'empty', 'meaningless', or 'dishonest' and scorn to use them. No matter how 'pure' their motives, they thereby throw sand into machinery that does not woik too well at best.
</tip type="Interpersonal Communication/Lubrication"> |
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This isn't a private club? |
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So who did I just pay my three hundred dollar membership fee to? |
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I said "You Ain't Seen Me!" |
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Now that toast has been freeze-dried, time to clean the Swiss Cheese |
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So toast is toast again? (I note that Mr Toast is also dusted - is there a pattern here?) |
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toast with swiss cheese... now I'm getting hungry. |
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a) why did this churn if the last anno is from 2002? |
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b) How long did it take you to come up with this pattern? |
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//Because you posted something to it// |
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That works. Or, it could have been my "Dumpster Diver". In any case, I'm happy! I didn't see this before. |
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Now I understand Mr.[UnaBubba], owner of the mystic UnaBlubber! But I see a flaw; this idea proposes that all bakers will post in a defined order with defined perspectives on a chaotic site. Hmm, something seems wrong. |
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I was expecting this to be a set of drop-down menu alternatives. |
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Welcome - Please read the help file
WIBNI
I love it
etc. |
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This idea is more of an excuse to make a witty observation of the habits and mannerisms of '02 bakers. Having said that, it made me laugh, so bun from me. We need an updated version, though! |
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<In danger of sidetracking the purpose of the idea by taking it literally>
Ideas for introducing newbies:
- Have a three month delay between receiving account and being allowed to post an idea.
- Require proof that newbie has read other ideas such as a toll of the number of comments, answering a well crafted questionnaire on the Help file or oft repeated / classically bad / classically good ideas
- Require newbies to learn secret handshake and make them stand on one leg with a single bared nipple, whilst swearing on the sacred Hullabaloon to keep the spirit of Halfbakery alive. |
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I can't be bothered to see how many of these have already been posted.
</Idostpotibtil> |
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[TheLights]: //Require proof that newbie has read other ideas//
[TheLights]: //I can't be bothered to see how many of these have already been posted// |
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Other Standard Responses Include:
"When I read the title, I thought this was going to be an idea about <insert pun on title here> and am now <pleasantly surprised | severely disappointed>."
etc.. |
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//Because you posted something to it?// |
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No, it was shown as new and anno'd in my main page. That's how I found it in the first place (although I do normally like to take credit for removing some dust from good ideas every now and again, I'm afraid I must admit that this was entirely not me). |
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Must have been the Ghost of Bakers Past. |
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karma will getcha, 8th of 7
signed;
blessmess |
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Around here we call 'em butt thimbles...it just sounds better, right??? (eww) |
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We would prefer something that sounded worse as long as it felt better ........ (EEWWW) |
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When I saw the first line of zen_tom's anno I thought it was going to be about semaphore but now... |
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// Why did no-one tell me of this // |
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We did, we all shouted, but you were preoccupied with roasting a new Troll over a slow fire, and didn't hear us..... your only response was a call for "Faggots ! Bring me more faggots !" whic caused some confusion to the assembled Halfbakers as depending on one's cultural background, the word has different meanings ...... |
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// I didn't notice, what with the smell and all. // |
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No... it always worries us when you get that strange little smile, and that bright, glassy look in your eyes. We woory that you may not have been taking your medication like you promised when they discharged you. |
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But yes, the smell was sooooooo good..... |
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Our pleasure. You want fries with that .... ? |
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Ok, fries, ketchup, and a King size Lithium Deuteride to go ...... |
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Ha! A fantastically one-sided conversation from 8th there. Now enshrined on the interweb for all time. What a loon all the future people will think him/it/them! |
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So you think. We have all of [UB]'s
annotations, indeed all our ideas and
postings, archived; there's just no convenient
way of re-inserting the annos in the correct
positions. |
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