h a l f b a k e r yRenovating the wheel
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I've always thought that those charity workers that appear ubiquitously around the holiday season look really bored as they clang that bell. And I'm sure the constant "DING DING" sound of the bell can't be pleasant over long periods of time. So... Instead of a bell, I propose that they be given a nice
big drum kit to bang around on. It would give them something to do that's actually fun, and it would attract a crowd, the members of which are probably more likely to give money after hearing a drum performance. And the charities would have no lack of volunteers for "bell duty" once it becomes "drum duty" - I mean, who doesn't want to pound away on some drums for a while?
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Obligatory ...ba-rum-pa-pum-pum. "One more time!" (crowd of passerby goes berserk) Post |
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Then how about harmonicas? Anything's better than the constant ringing. |
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Anything? You sure about that? I mean, one reason bells are so popular is that everyone can play a bell. Kind of like the half-retarded kid who played the triangle in the school band. But if you'd ever heard me try and play the harmonica for an extended period of time, you'd gladly hand me a bell. |
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Bells are noisy. Drums are noisy. Harmonicas can make an awful racket.
Give them each a festive plastic kazoo. There. Much better. |
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//ba-rum-pa-pum-pum//
Obligatory "Hello ... you're the new butler?" Post. |
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I don't want to work, I just want to bang on me drum all day... |
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I would be tempted to join-in with a guitar and vocals |
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I'm always tempted to holler "Bring out yer dead" whenever I hear a streetcorner santa ringing that bell. |
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I say give santa an air horn,
bagpipes or even a spining light
with a siren. |
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Give santa a light and siren, people will start running ... |
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