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This will be the first ever slide that can catch people falling from an airplane. The trick is to build the slide with an incredibly steep slope. Say the slide goes from 90 degrees vetical to 89 degrees in 500 feet. The rate of the slope going to zero would be the shape of an exponential curve. The
only difference is that the slide would be built up the side of some sky scraper. Slick the slide down with water and let the fun begin.
Fairly Halfbaked
Parachute-less_20base_20jumping
[Shz, Jun 23 2006]
[link]
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how do you get it underneath the airplane
that requires it? it's not like you can carry
around this slide. |
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Coat the slide with teflon. |
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Don't forget the logarithmic scale down the side - doubling the invention up into an Enormous Slide - Rule. |
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I had a similar thought a few years ago after visiting a fun park, when I thought how cool it would be to jump off the White Cliffs of Dover. I think building it on to a skyscraper is better and maybe could be used as an emergency escape route in case of fire. Maybe even build all skyscrapers this way allowing for a fast exit if the elevator is full. |
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Awesome! [+] Although I'm assuming this
slide isn't your average open top one, wind
force would undoubtably rip you off the
slide by your clothes as you approach
amazing speeds.
Perhaps the slide could be a perspex/
transparent plastic one? Although I
wouldn't want to be the attendant catching
all the turds at the bottom! |
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This slide will need to go back up onto a second, lower skyscraper on the other side. Either that or have sleds withe brakes. Otherwise there is nothing to slow you down except friction. If you reduce the friction of the slide you will prolong the time it takes to slow, but in the end all of that kinetic energy goes into your butt. |
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With the second slide you would slow gravitationally, and pop up at the other side. It offers the possibility of a series of slides. |
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It's the spectre of, hmm, 80kg x 300m x 9.81 ms-2 = approx 240kJ being dissipated into my backside in just thirty seconds or so that scares me... like sitting on an 8kW hotplate. Definitely needs to be a waterslide with a looong water brake at the bottom. |
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The only issue would be lining up with the vertical section of the slide when you jump from the plane. To solve this problem a large flourescent ring would be fitted over the top of the slide. If the diver passes through the ring he or she will be brought to rest by the slide. If they miss the ring they would still have a couple thousand feet to deploy a parachute. |
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if it's enclosed, you can brake at the
bottom with a series or u-bends that bleed
off excess momentum and keep you
moving down the slide so you aren't run
over by the faster moving more recent
additions to the slide. |
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i still want to know how you're supposed
to catch a falling airplane if you can't move
it. |
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Could you get David Blaine to test this? Thus: if it works, great. If it fails and the user explodes from arse friction, great. There's just no downside. |
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Edit: could this friction problem be somehow combated by combining with the Automated Pussy Wettener? |
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I dont know who the first user would be. Preventing sideways motion would be a problem. The slide would have to have a shallow bend.
I could see thousands of wet pussies sliding down the slide to slick it up. Put a lesson to that pussy. BAD PUSSY. |
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What happens when wind effects
carry you a few feet away from the
near-vertical section and you hit a
less steep section of the ramp
with a thud? |
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All four facades of all skyscrapers exceeding three stories should have this "slide". Therefore, anyone trying to commit suicide will end up sliding down a steep ramp. For added kicks, you can set up bowling pins or huge cream pies along the bottom perimeter. |
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