Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Get Rich Quick Pandemic

 Make money off gullibility and panic
  (+3)
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The whole toilet paper hoarding thing for an ailment that does not target the poop chute makes no sense at all.

For the next pandemic I propose that a small, select group of individuals (I don't know, us?) decide on a product that nobody really needs but that is available everywhere and produced entirely with local ingredients. Coca Cola for example. We tout the benefits of said product and determine that having it in great abundance will protect one from the current malady.

When the buying spree begins we all buy that product's stock and ride it up, selling it all when it begins to taper off.

—whatrock, Mar 23 2020

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       "It's a million-to-one chance, but it might just work ..."   

       [+]
—8th of 7, Mar 23 2020
   

       I've been secretly informed that playing the accordion is an amazing treatment for Corvid-20.
—blissmiss, Mar 23 2020
   

       Oh, holy shit no. Oh no.
—blissmiss, Mar 23 2020
   

       // playing the accordion is an amazing treatment //   

       It certainly is; after you've been incinerated in a Wicker Man for your sins by a rampaging mob, you're guaranteed to be free from infection.   

       Dead, of course, but definitely free from infection.   

       // Lurgi - that can only be warded off with brass band instruments. //   

       What ? Is the Moriarty Patent Conk-Protector of no value in such circumstances ?   

       Is our Batter Pudding in danger ?
—8th of 7, Mar 23 2020
   

       //Make money off gullibility and panic// [m-f-d] widely known to exist
—pocmloc, Mar 23 2020
   

       Ohhhh, villains and horrors, ohhhh ! Where's our emergency escape bass drum ! Now, Ellinger, a gallon of Seagoon's Last Stand special vintage Albanian BRANNDDDYYYYYY !   

       <Sound of glugging and bass drum being thumped, dubbed over receeding running boots/>
—8th of 7, Mar 23 2020
   


 

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