h a l f b a k e r yA dish best served not.
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Alright. Here goes. I'm sure that our technology is
sophisticated enough that we can calculate the volume of a
person passing through someone, or even do a combination of
a volume and weight scan to calculate the BMI of a passerby.
What I propose is this, similar to metal detectors that BEEP
when you pass through with just a piece of tin foil in your
pocket. Why can't we have a BMI detector that BEEPS when
you're obese ? This is a health epidemic- a friendly reminder
would encourage people to take action for their health.
Of course, the downside is that all that beeping is bound to
drive a person MAD.
Body Fat Analyzers
http://www.bodytren...n306fatanalyzer.htm Are entirely Baked, and built into most exercise machines. Go to the gym, yer lazy sod. [DrCurry, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
Gut Control
http://web.archive....a/Gutless_20America Did better than this one, but still didn't make it into croissant territory, so you should probably retire in the face of the humorless. [DrCurry, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
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Baked: The electronic door chime at a KFC? |
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(Goes to his lab to invent the Fat-Detector Jamming Device and Mirror Disabler. I'll make millions!) |
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"calculate the volume of a person passing through someone"? |
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It's ghost fat, for which a special ghost-fat detector is needed. |
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This is needed, because an obese person clearly wouldn't have any other way of knowing. |
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Can't identify satire, Dim? |
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It's ghost satire, for which a special ghost-satire detector is needed. |
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This would be a great thing to install anywhere, because people love to be reminded how fat they are. Perhaps they could make sounds when the handicapped or unattractive passed through as well. |
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We already have perfectly good devices to inform people of their physical dimensions.
What we don't have, though are useful devices to give people a friendly reminder that they are being offensive or stupid, to encourage them to take evasive action for their health. (heavy people know that they're heavy, but stupid people are... ignorant)
Of course, the downside is that all that beeping inside my head is bound to drive me INSANE. |
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This is possibly the worst idea I've ever heard. And not just on the Halfbakery. No, I'm including such ideas as 'let's kill all the Jews, then life will be great' and 'investing in dot-coms is the safest bet.' |
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I wish I had some more fishbones. |
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I agree that Fat Tax is worse, but this idea is pretty damn dire. Here's a friendly reminder that you're a dick. |
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//sophisticated enough that we can calculate the volume of a person passing through someone// |
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Pluterday already explained it. |
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It's pluterday satire, for which a special pluterday-satire detector is needed. |
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