Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Eternal Revenue Service

Self-interest Calculated Daily
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A bank like no other, where the riches you can take with you are stored for your afterlife, in whatever form you believe that may be.

The things that went "on your permanent record at school"; that kept you awake in the wee hours of the morning or that just went unnoticed at the time and it didn't feel right to bring to the attention of others.

For a small fee, UBCo will store them in a vast database, that may be accessed by whomever writes your eulogy, if you get one.

We shall remember them.

UnaBubba, Apr 16 2019

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       The truely dead are otherwised engaged, they either, won't give a neuron cycle or will be flooded by energy of people are getting some secondhand life stimulus. Either way they won't care.   

       I can't imagine for those that didn't completely die.
wjt, Apr 16 2019
  

       //The truely dead are otherwised engaged// I believe they're fully occupied in the Brexit negotiations.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 16 2019
  

       This is very creepy. VERRRY Creepy. I like it.
blissmiss, Apr 17 2019
  

       I’m going to stick with my original plan of robbing St Peter to pay St Paul.
AusCan531, Apr 17 2019
  

       //I believe they're fully occupied in the Brexit negotiations//   

       Ah.. so this is purgatory then.
Skewed, Apr 21 2019
  

       Absolutely. But purging the tories is only the beginning.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 21 2019
  

       Somewhat baked in the form of long-term savings trusts for people who go in for cryonic freezing.
sninctown, Apr 21 2019
  
      
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