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Belgium has been running for an extended period with a "caretaker"
government, since the system of representative democracy has
repeatedly failed to produce a stable and viable coalition.
This makes Belgium, by some definitions, a "failed state".
It may be advantageous, therefore, to consider
the intervention of
an outside agency.
Several possibilities arise.
Since Belgium was created by other European powers as a sort of
special place to have wars in, a number of hostile takeovers have
ensued, notably in 1914 and 1940 (No names, no panzer drill). It
would probably not be best therefore to invite - just as an example -
the Germans to annexe Belgium. There might be a certain amount
of public feeling against it. The same goes for a number of other
European states.
Intervention by the USA would - based on the current pattern of
behavior of that nation - probably consist of a large number of air
strikes against infrastructure coupled with prolonged harangues in
favor of "Democracy" on CNN. Since it is democracy that has
produced the problem, trying to bomb the Belgian population into
being democratic may be counter-productive.
However:
The EU has a major presence in Brussels, and is setting itself up to
be a "Federal" government in Europe.
We suggest that, as a proof-of-concept, the EU should be mandated
by the UN to run Belgium as a going concern for five years.
At the end of this time, the Belgian population would indicate their
desire to (1) go back to their previous system, (2) remain under EU
governance, (3) annexe the Rhineland, Sudetenland and Austria,
then sweep North-Eastward into Poland, (4) become the 51st State
of the USA, (5) apply to the Japanese for advice on how to commit
racial suicide. This desire would be indicated by a referendum
carried out under internationally recognized supervision, or more
likely by mass armed insurrection.
A nice article about Belgium...
http://www.bedlampl.../hres/potw%2086.pdf
...and why it is likely to fall apart. [DrBob, Jul 29 2011]
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a rant, but a funny rant [+] |
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By the way, I think you mean "ensued". |
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I will shamelessly take credit for having partially inspired this rant. |
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I have also spent the better part of the afternoon antagonizing [8th], which I believe most Halfbakers will agree is a public service unto itself. |
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Well, the women in Belgium (possibly the greatest nation in the world) have all vowed not to have sex again until there is a new government. So the problem will go away after this last generation. |
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They should outsource their government, inviting
bids from interested governments under EU
commercial procurement rules. |
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Why not just auction their governmental process
wholesale? I'd put a bid in on that. |
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[Alterother], King of Belgium. |
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Watch your backs, Frenchies... |
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I rather think you have missed the point with this one, 8th. The issue isn't that the Belgians can't decide who they want to govern them but that they don't want Belgium to exist at all and would rather be two separate countries entirely. [-] |
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That can be arranged. There are already historical
precedents for cutting Belgium in half. |
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Ah, the Schlieffen Plan ... |
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Surely Belgium should just be divided up among the
other EU states on the basis of their population sizes
or EU budget contributions? Otherwise what's the
point of us being members of the EU? |
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// Ah, the Schlieffen Plan ... // |
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Once again, we seem to be on the same strange
wavelength... <chill runs down back/> Am I... am I turning
into... one of them?! |
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"Come ... join us ... don't be afraid ... you'll wonder why you ever hesitated ..." |
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<puts down book about European railroad history/> |
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"That voice... so hypnotic.. makes me want to... hoard
ammunition and start an underground resistance cell..." |
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<goes back to book, promptly falls asleep from boredom/> |
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... or the Masons, the Rosicrucians, opus Deii, the Illuminati ... |
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To be honest, they'd probably be a hell of a lot better off with an aggressive hegemonising cybernetic collective life form, and that's saying something. |
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At least we pay off our credit card bills at the end of every month. |
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// hoard ammunition and start an underground resistance cell // |
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That's just the voice of "common sense". |
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"We're advising all of our clients to put all of their money into canned foods and shotguns." |
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// book about European railroad history // |
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We have some VERY explicit pictures of Mallet 2-4-4-2 narrow gauge compounds, available in a plain brown wrapper to "discerning gentlemen customers". The password is "walschaerts" .... |
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The US is a failed state, yes, but Maine is not. We haven't
had any money for so long, we no longer have a use for it.
We're perfectly happy up here in the mountains with our
teleporting deer and underground resistance capacitors. |
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The Voices are particualrly loud and insistent today, aren't they, [Alt] ? |
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Think happy thoughts about the Mount Washington Cog Railway, and take deep breaths .... deep breaths ... that's it ... the red mist will go away ... deep breaths ... |
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(Yes, yes, we know it's in NH, but it's practically walking distance, once you've gnawed through the leather straps ....) |
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I happen to make a decent living using resistance.
Engineers like [8th] would be up shit creek without what I
do. |
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Okay, there are no other engineers like [8th], but my point
stands. |
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I'm a steel fabricator. I was cheekily pointing out a good
use for resistance (i.e. arc welding). |
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By night, writer, aspiring professional. Which is why I spend
so much time on HB. (If I didn't despise emoticons, I
suppose I would insert a winky-face here) |
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Just got a responce from an agent who wants to see more
of my work. Better than a rejection notice by a longshot. |
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// I suppose I would insert a winky-face here // |
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You could do that, but then we'd have to kill you ... |
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You wouldn't have to; the day I use an emoticon, I'll off
myself. |
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Have you met many welders? I can't really see this working,
except maybe as a comedy act... |
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We would pay a dollar to watch that. |
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Unfortunately, welding Belgians together is a lost art, as the special flux is no longer made. |
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Never apologize. All input has worth. This forum is the
closest thing I have ever found to a real-life version of
John Galt's secret valley. |
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Oh, sorry about that, we thought you were somebody we knew. |
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