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Destroying documents, safely and securely, is big
business.
This is because doing it properly is more difficult than it
sounds, especially now that we store them all on
computer
storage media, as well as paper.
The new UBCo Docterminator is what you really want.
A puddle of rhenium,
encased in a tantalum hafnium
carbide retort and kept just above melting point can be
installed in a well-insulated cubicle in your office, for a
fee of course. Yes, there will be an ongoing cost to run
the electric arc furnace we'll have to install with it.
Then, when you want to "lose" a document; Destroy that
unfortunate Xmas party photocopy of your buttocks;
Trash an entire file on your former workmate who's now
your manager; Wipe a hard drive from the face of the
earth or just reheat your cold coffee in less than a
second, the Docterminator is for you.
It won't be back. Honest.
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Can it be shaped like a Dalek? |
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Am I the only halfbaker who thinks that daleks are frankly lame? |
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However, I could go for a Dalek turned upside down,
so it looks like a weird wastepaper basket. |
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How magmanimous they would seem to be, installing
such a thing. |
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