h a l f b a k e r yIt's as much a hovercraft as a pancake is a waffle.
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I'm lucky. I live a country where water is cheap and plentiful, and high-pressure, so I can float an an anti-theft idea such as this one.
How about running an irrigation-type hose across the outside above all doors and windows with a nozzle at each opening unit.
At a simple level a quick-action
main-control lever in the kitchen would dowse a suspected intruder.
Enhancements could include a dye additive, a link with a infrared lighting system, a sound detector and so on.
Dowsing with a hose deters dogs but I've done no trials with intruders. Don't watch this space.
And would the system be of any use against an internal fire, if sited only across windows and doors?
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A dye additive is great, but why stop there? Add some pepper spray (my best friend downtown) or hot pepper extract to the mix and you won't need to track the burglar- I've *never* seen anyone stand up after a blast of that stuff! |
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Of course, pepper spray isn't legal everywhere. As another additive in addition to dye, why not try something that stinks as well? That way, the would-be perp will be colourful, smelly, and very easy to track. |
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And you'll never have trouble finding your way home, either -- just follow the smell. |
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If you want "Cheap" security, change it to "Cheep" and get a couple of chickens to stand guard. Then if you get tired of them, or they lay down on the job (tsk, tsk) you can have them for supper. |
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P.S. would work better with geese, but they don't "cheep"...would have lost what little humor (very little) that there was in this annotation. |
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(Watch-goose prior art: The sacred geese of Juno in ancient Rome who allegedly once foiled a sneak attack during a siege by squawking.) |
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<<How about running an irrigation-type hose across the outside above all doors and windows with a nozzle at each opening unit>> |
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They used to give away squirt caps in cereal boxes that would screw onto a 2-liter bottle and you would squeeze the bottle to squirt someone. Fortunately (or unfortunately) I found out that the screw-threads for a 2-liter bottle are the same as those on the end of a garden hose. I totally destroyed a beehive in the overhead bird-house, cleaned windows, dug holes, and shot water up very high using this newly-made "pressure washer". |
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a fire localised near doors and windows? that would be convenient... unless you wanted to escape... hang on a minute... you jes given me an idea! |
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