Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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There goes my teleportation concept.

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Cereal Killer

A vegetarian serial killer movie plot
 
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This would be something like KungFu meets Dexter meets Steven King meets Waiting for Godot -- a Buhdist monk who has taken vows of silence, hermeticism and non-violence, and lives by himself but is fed whole vegetables daily through a hole in the wall, never-the- less, becomes a serial killer, of the vegetables, and to pass the time invents, complex plot lines that involve many police vegetables standing around talking about who the killer might be, while the lone human in the room is surreptitiously slicing and dicing up one at a time of their companions.
JesusHChrist, Nov 24 2013

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seiriol [pocmloc, Nov 25 2013]

[link]






       This is not just an idea constructed to support a pun. It's an idea constructed to support an old and well-worn pun.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 24 2013
  

       Also, vegetables are not cereals.
pocmloc, Nov 24 2013
  

       The idea came first, from watching Dexter, where the stereotypic serial killer is really smart, and thinking that if they are so smart then why aren't they vegetarians, and then thinking that maybe really really smart serial killers just turn into really good vegetarian cooks.   

       Maybe this monk could only cook grains and only use a really fine point exacto knife to do his slicing and dicing.
JesusHChrist, Nov 24 2013
  

       If he sliced up fish instead he could be a Serial Giller …
8th of 7, Nov 24 2013
  

       If, by murder, one proposes to express, either physically, in premeditation, or by any other manner, the real functioning of thought in the absence of all control exercised by reason, outside of all aesthetic and moral preoccupation...   

       Would it make them a surreal killer?   

       If they did it more than once in an underground room, would they be a serial surreal cellar killer?
8th of 7, Nov 24 2013
  

       A fridge containing elver in lemon.
pocmloc, Nov 24 2013
  

       If instead of slicing up vegetables he performed repair on transport vehicles, would be then be a Truck Mechanic?   

       (Wait, am I doing this right?)
ytk, Nov 24 2013
  

       corny
not_morrison_rm, Nov 24 2013
  

       Tuber killosis?   

       If a large enough group of Americans went vegan could they form their own vegetative state?   

       Do white supremacists who go vegan become vegetaryans?   

       So many questions, so little thyme.   

       Barbecuing his victims one at a time the serial griller sought to open a restaurant, but could not get a health permit. Deadly bacteria was found in the human beans.
popbottle, Nov 25 2013
  

       Remember Pythagoras! We should avenge his death!
pocmloc, Nov 25 2013
  

       If he only killed a beknighted anguilliform, he would be a Sir Eel killer.
swimswim, Nov 25 2013
  

       And if the microbioligical bacteria was devlivered via Uline Heat Sealer, would they be a serial surreal cellar cellular sealer killer?
JesusHChrist, Nov 26 2013
  

       <peers into discussion, slips back out quietly and moves away>
AusCan531, Nov 26 2013
  

       <ditto>
not_morrison_rm, Nov 26 2013
  
      
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