Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Cat incapacitator

For when your making dinner and don't want to leave kitty alone in the room.
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When food preperation is in progress our cat is never far away, biding her time untill everyone has left the room and she can jump up on the bench and help herself. The "cat incapacitator" is a device that immobilizes the cat so she can not carry out her feindish plan.

When cats are kittens their mothers carry them around by picking them up by the scruf of the neck, so they don't squirm evoloution has come to the rescue of mother cat by making it so when the nerves in the skin of her kittens neck are pinched it becomes paralysed, the cat grows out of this but not entirely.

You will find that if you tie somthing round the body of a cat (like a teatowel) between the front legs and back legs the cat can't walk very far, at least not far enough to get from the fire to the kitchen bench, it dosen't need to be tied tightly just loosely will do, the cat tries to walk but it is low to the ground and its back legs start to sway and wham, it hits the ground after about 1-2 meters.

An elastic ring with some sort of padding on it in different sizes for different cats would be a great product to keep the kittys under control when your out of the room, just slip it over their neck and front paws and all they can do is lie on the ground and look at the food from afar.

(try the tea towel thing it really works)

Gulherme, Sep 07 2002

Cat incapacitator http://dbhs.wvusd.k...or/Cat-Carrier.html
This'd do it, although the beast'll never talk to you again [dare99, Sep 09 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Cat Paper http://www.halfbake...per_20(Cat_20Paper)
Quick, cheap and effective. [8th of 7, Sep 10 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

[link]






       takes up too much space, this just renders the cats legs useless.
Gulherme, Sep 07 2002
  

       Size 11 boot (UK) = Cat Incapacitator
Jinbish, Sep 07 2002
  

       Perhaps I would have found this amusing until I read that G here actually does this. I don't want to know why you tie stuff to your cat.
waugsqueke, Sep 07 2002
  

       A case of 'Strap *this* to the back of your cat!' being taken with more seriousness than ever could have been intended?
st3f, Sep 07 2002
  

       As a matter of interest, does anyone know the capacitance of a cat (in farads) to assess the impact of putting a cat in a capacitor?
PeterSilly, Sep 07 2002
  

       A cat's balance is such that tying a sock or something around them with the knot on one side throws their balance off and it's hard to walk. Makes them really mad, too. It doesn't hurt the cat, aside from denting one's Dignity.
StarChaser, Sep 07 2002
  

       As starchaser said, "It dosen't hurt the cat" so I cant see how this is a bad thing, the reason I tie things to my cat is because one day one of my friends said "hey check this out its really funny" and tied a tea towel around my cat and she couldn't walk, this did hurt her dignity but I'm sure that if I bought a cat incapacitator that matched the colour of her eyes she wouldn't be as upset.
Gulherme, Sep 08 2002
  

       Or you could just put them in another room and shut the door. Leaves their dignity intact and still solves the problem.
Aurora, Sep 08 2002
  

       are you going to use that towel to dry the dishes afterwards? having had a couple of bouts of vertigo, I am none too impressed with this idea - like Aurora says put them in another room or out in the garden.
po, Sep 08 2002
  

       I had high hopes of this idea from the title, but was deeply disappointed by it's generally begnign and pro-feline aspect ...... visions of spring traps, jets of hot melt glue, or tiny ball-and-chain kits sprang to mind.... but no.   

       But fear not, I have the answer: a staple gun !   

       <THUNK> <THUNK> <THUNK> <THUNK> <THUNK> - all four paws and the tail. Staple the cat to a handy piece of chip boaard and the problem is solved permamently.   

       PeterSilly: The idea of using the cat AS the capacitor is better .... now, where's that Wimshurst machine ?
8th of 7, Sep 09 2002
  

       [8th] - that's what I thought the idea was all about, until I read it. It's stunning just how useful staple guns are, isn't it. First as toupee fasteners for Coupé Toupees, then as a cat incapactitator...
PeterSilly, Sep 09 2002
  

       I have nothing but praise for the staple gun, a tool of the most excellent utility, speed, and effciency, safe in the vexed matter fo the fixture of glass mirror tiles to architectural surfaces, for which function I can testify it is entirely unsuited.
8th of 7, Sep 09 2002
  

       All this umming and ahhing about how to incapacitate a cat and no-one has yet mentioned the humble tazer.   

       ZAP, one incapacitated moggy.   

       Alternatively, check the link.
dare99, Sep 09 2002
  

       just wondering why 8th is single and childless....oh, never mind, I figured it out (at least he loves doggies ;-)
Marassa, Sep 09 2002
  

       I'm so glad you posted that, dare: means I didn't have to! (I've been holding off for days..)
yamahito, Sep 10 2002
  

       I wouldn't talk to you again, either; I'd just ambush you in the dark, stuff a ball gag in one end, a railroad spike in the other and tie you to the back of a car.   

       StarChaser Tiger.
StarChaser, Sep 11 2002
  

       Didn't I meet you at a party at Barrymores the other week Starchaser?
dare99, Oct 05 2002
  
      
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