Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.

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Bushido newspaper carriers

Samuri paper delivery
  (+21, -2)(+21, -2)
(+21, -2)
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A Way of the Paperperson, with a bit of martial art added. Bushido paperpersons will perform elaborate delivery kata when placing the paper, and will have special techniques for rolling and throwing the paper, passed down through generations.

They will also have the concept of seppuku, the act of self-sacrifice which must be done if one has brought dishonour to the Bushido, perhaps by being late with a delivery, or leaving it in the garden plot.

Larkspur, Aug 17 2001

Wikipedia: Millwall brick http://en.wikipedia...wiki/Millwall_brick
On the use of newspapers as weapons among football hooligans. [jutta, Mar 04 2007]

[link]






       Will the real Rachel please stand up? I'm confused.
Dog Ed, Aug 17 2001
  

       That's S-a-m-u-r-a-i, OK?
Toreadorothy, Aug 17 2001
  

       Excellent, the first sign of self-referential fiction within these hallowed cyberhalls.
Toreadorothy, Aug 18 2001
  

       Most of us would not be awake early enough to see the newspaper being delivered, so this idea is impractical. I'll take some of that Croissant!
darkknight_152002, Jul 26 2003
  

       What's a newspaper?
Eugene, Oct 14 2003
  

       Having spent some small time studying newspaper martial arts, I can appreciate this...
normzone, Jan 26 2004
  

       I seem to remember that a tightly rolled newspaper can make an excellent weapon in a pinch, especially if you roll it around a carving knife.
ldischler, Jan 26 2004
  

       //especially if you roll it around a carving knife//   

       I've heard you can do that effectively with snakes as well.
k_sra, Jan 26 2004
  

       Did I really say what it looks like I said up there? I don't remember saying it.
Eugene, Jan 26 2004
  

       I imagine the Bushido would make a tidy profit around collection time. Who wouldn't give a some edgy Bushido paperperson with a samurai sword a fat tip?
voiceofreason, Feb 25 2004
  

       it's a fun idea but i wouldn't reccomend it for my neighborhood. since the newspaper always comes late AND is always in my garden I think there would be a shortage of newspaper delivery men thus causing the paper to come even later starting a chain reaction.
The Guy On The Couch, Apr 20 2006
  

       We have a newspaper girl who has trouble hitting the broad side of an apartment building with a paper. Quote: "I can't control where the paper goes" and she means it.   

       We've lost several patio plants - she obviously hasn't found her sensei yet.
normzone, Apr 20 2006
  

       I work for a newspaper. This level of commitment and discipline in the carrier staff would be beneficial to everyone.
Noexit, Mar 06 2007
  
      
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