h a l f b a k e r yCrust or bust.
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A Way of the Paperperson, with a bit of martial art added.
Bushido paperpersons will perform elaborate delivery kata
when placing the paper, and will have special techniques for
rolling and throwing the paper, passed down through
generations.
They will also have the concept of seppuku, the
act of
self-sacrifice which must be done if one has brought
dishonour to the Bushido, perhaps by being late with a
delivery, or leaving it in the garden plot.
Wikipedia: Millwall brick
http://en.wikipedia...wiki/Millwall_brick On the use of newspapers as weapons among football hooligans. [jutta, Mar 04 2007]
[link]
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Will the real Rachel please stand up? I'm confused. |
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That's S-a-m-u-r-a-i, OK? |
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Excellent, the first sign of self-referential fiction within these hallowed cyberhalls. |
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Most of us would not be awake early enough to see the newspaper being delivered, so this idea is impractical. I'll take some of that Croissant! |
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Having spent some small time studying newspaper martial arts, I can appreciate this... |
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I seem to remember that a tightly rolled newspaper can make an excellent weapon in a pinch, especially if you roll it around a carving knife. |
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//especially if you roll it around a carving knife// |
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I've heard you can do that effectively with snakes as well. |
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Did I really say what it looks like I said up there? I don't remember saying it. |
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I imagine the Bushido would make a tidy profit around collection time. Who wouldn't give a some edgy Bushido paperperson with a samurai sword a fat tip? |
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it's a fun idea but i wouldn't reccomend it for my neighborhood. since the newspaper always comes late AND is always in my garden I think there would be a shortage of newspaper delivery men thus causing the paper to come even later starting a chain reaction. |
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We have a newspaper girl who has trouble hitting the broad side of an apartment building with a paper. Quote: "I can't control where the paper goes" and she means it. |
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We've lost several patio plants - she obviously hasn't found her sensei yet. |
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I work for a newspaper. This level of commitment and discipline in the carrier staff would be beneficial to everyone. |
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