Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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Bumtarp

 An ounce of prevention.
 
(+1, -1) 		  [vote for,
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Anyone who has ever painted a room knows that it easier to clean up afterwards if you put down tarps beforehand. Much easier than chasing around stray paint with a rag and sponge. But why is this prinicple not applied to matters poopal?

Now it is. The bumtarp is a stack of square thin films with a light adhesive and a small slit in the center. The user peels off a tarp and applies it over the anus. After voiding, the user simply peels away the soiled bumtarp and is through. Some users may prefer to apply several bumtarps in the morning and work down through them over the course of the day.

The bumtarp would be useful for the hemorrhoided, the frequent, the chafed, the skidmarked and the lazy.

—bungston, Nov 18 2003

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       Ewwww, but have a bum....err I mean bun.
—silverstormer, Nov 18 2003
   

       Ewwww, have a fishbone.
—DrCurry, Nov 18 2003
   

       "Bum(w)rap" would be a more fitting title, I would think.
—Tiger Lily, Nov 18 2003
   

       Bunghole,...um, Bungston, there is something wrong with your analogy. You see, the poop will be coming from *inside* your body, not from outside. I doubt that your paperettes will hold so airtight around the anus that they can prevent "inside jobs", if you understand what I mean.   

       However, if you are putting on soiled underpants, then I believe bum-tarps can provide useful protection.
—phundug, Nov 18 2003
   

       Have these "poop-tarps" cover the backs of the legs and ankles, so when I'm taking a pit stop in the woods, the other campers don't laugh at me ... THEN and ONLY THEN will I reverse the fishbone
—Letsbuildafort, Nov 18 2003
   

       If you made the 'slit' into a more interesting shape such as a star, crescent or square you might create a trend for deliberately and artistically shaped logs.
—dobtabulous, Nov 19 2003
   

       Yuck. No point, really, unless it had the same type of elasticity as a sphincter (which is massive) and could be sealed close to....yuck.   

       This is quite revolting. The easiest part would be putting this into production. Hard = getting someone to use it.
—Macwarrior, Nov 19 2003
   

       Where could I find it in the drug store? ... and if you say "the toy asile" I'm going to hurt you
—Letsbuildafort, Nov 19 2003
   

       //It actually wasn't too hard to put it on... //   

       No, but after I tried to rip it off, I bled for a week...
—yamahito, Nov 19 2003
   

       Perhaps you could sell this in 2-packs with a PeeCone, designed to avoid similar problems with the other voiding function? Newton's 4th law is now repealed.
—phlogiston, Nov 19 2003
   


 

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