h a l f b a k e r yI CAN HAZ CROISSANTZ?
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A conventional metre-long black powder musket barrel, 20mm calibre, with a flintlock firing mechanism.
Instead of a conventional stock, the weapon has a shoulder pad immediately behind the breech.
A carved pistol grip and trigger guard are located at an appropriate point along the wooden fore-end.
The lock is actuated by a pushrod contained within the stock.
The ramrod is carried in brass thimbles on the right side of the weapon, which can only be fired right-handed.
A carved wooden cheek-piece is provided, and a stout metal screen between the firer's head and the lock mechanism. The sight is a simple corn, offset on the left of the barrel next to the muzzle (and doubling as a bayonet lug) to conform with the typical position of the firer's head.
Sling swivels are provided.
WARNING: May cause serious injury or death if used correctly.
burgonet
http://www.metmuseu...5&OID=40006187&vT=1 What's a falling buffe? [mouseposture, Apr 29 2010]
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"on either end" is missing from the disclaimer. |
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//flintlock// - be sure to keep the powder for the musket and the powder for the wig separate, and clearly marked. |
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What else are manservants for ? |
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You want to bring the breech of a non-percussion firearm closer to your head? Crazy man. |
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"Metal screen" is right. Now I have to assume that you, being who you are, have fired a flintlock weapon before. And know how big the pan flash can be, especially if the wadding is tight, and the weapon has been used a lot (and the fire hole is a bit flogged out). |
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Does it come with an asbestos face mask and burn cream? |
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Big fat bun for anything that's a test of manhood, just to use. |
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//asbestos face mask//
Would be a creative opportunity for craftsmen who
manufacture armor. Picture something like <link>
but covering only half the head. |
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// asbestos face mask and burn cream // |
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You get a leather shako with a hinge-down flap, a tub of goose grease, a nice red uniform with white pipeclayed crossbelts, and a confident assurance from your Officer (who is notably standing some distance away) that It's All For The Good Of The Old Country, Don'tyerknow. |
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// what can I say, but 'YES!'? // |
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Well ... how about, "AWAWAOOOOWWWOOOWSHIT MY EAR'S ON FIRE, MY EAR ! AHHHRGH, JESUS CHRIST, GET SOME WATER, AHRWAOOO OUCH OUCH OUCH that HURTS !" ? |
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//"AWAWAOOOOWWWOOOWSHIT MY EAR'S ON FIRE, MY EAR ! AHHHRGH, JESUS CHRIST, GET SOME WATER, AHRWAOOO OUCH OUCH OUCH that HURTS !"// |
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For a small fee to cover shipping and handling, FTCo will supply: |
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a) an exquisitely engraved doublewide buttplate that protects the outer shoulder from exploding material and distributes the recoil load over a wider area. The piece also curves upwards and forwards to partially cover the pan, allowing from-the-hip operation without setting one's expensive uniform ablaze. Two sets of mounting holes make provision for both north or southpaw musqueteers. |
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b) a Gunsen folding fan, of asbestos and kevlar layers, mounted longitudinally on top of the operator end of the barrel at a 45 angle. Closed it rests flush on the barrel; opened it keeps the operator's face from turning into an ad hoc match fusee. |
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c) waterproof paper-cartridge cases, and giant pez-type ball dispensers, both in matching engraved silver. |
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// WARNING: May cause serious injury or death if used
correctly. // |
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I laughed so much it brought on chest pains; the lethal range of this idea may prove longer than originally envisaged. |
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