h a l f b a k e r yBreakfast of runners-up.
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How about I stand sort of close for an hour or so every day? |
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There seem to be some non-singularity prototypes around here. They feel pretty good, but they make strange noises when you start urinating. |
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This is not the sort of idea that should be ridiculed. Doesn't
anyone understand the gravity of the situation? |
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I think you might need the old lead y-fronts for the radiation, Hawking or otherwise. Apart from that, a perfectly sound idea. |
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How do you attach them? I suppose you could nail them to a planck. |
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Why limit it to urinals? Seems like it would also be an
effective way to dispose of, er, dark matter. |
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I can't help but imagine there will be someone on the other end of the black hole thinking, "...what the hell???..." |
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I highly approve. Let 'em eat cake. [+] |
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Via the spaghetti effect, the user standing too close would have the longest and thinnest penis in the world--at least in that microsecond before it snapped off. |
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The potential for this idea to go disastrously and horribly wrong in a large number of different and unpredictable ways is almost infinite. |
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These would also help with ventilation. |
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Well now I'm sure that somebody's just taking the piss... |
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How about we just insert the black hole right into the bladder? There would never be a need for a urinal, anywhere. |
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What is the ration of urinals to men, anyhow? If there aren't enough black holes for every man's bladder, we might have to parcel them out to urinals, as originally suggested. |
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I give a [+} for nobody mentioning a "brown hole". Oh... I just did. |
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Well, worm-hole will never have same connotation for me again that's for sure. |
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Bonus: As they absorb more matter, they become troughs, and could be moved to the restrooms of minor-league baseball stadia. |
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Unfortunately, if you didn't aim directly at the center, an accretion disk of urine would form, along with a relativistic jet of plasma, which of course would incinerate all life forms in said men's room. Still, [+] |
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//incinerate all life forms in said men's room//
"Sterilized, for your protection." |
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At least you'd have a place to sweep the ashes into. |
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Standing next to one of my dark-skinned cow-orkers once, both of us using those urinals that go from floor to waist, I said - |
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" Wow, this water is cold ! " |
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Not missing a beat, he added - |
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I think it would have to be a small black hole and you would have to state several miles from it or else it will suck you into it. |
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So in other words, nothing out of the ordinary... |
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I really hope you got that from the excellent film "slingblade" - although I suspect it's more common than that. |
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Technically, small singularities are possible, in fact
probable, and many may have survived from the early days
of the universe (primordial micro black holes). There would
only be two problems with using them. 1) We've never
found any. 2) They can only be positioned using antimatter
and we haven't found any of that either. |
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Technically, small singularities are possible, in fact
probable, and many may have survived from the early days
of the universe (primordial micro black holes). There would
only be two problems with using them. 1) We've never
found any. 2) They can only be positioned using antimatter
and we haven't found any of that either. |
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Ah yes, but from your link: A primordial black hole with an
initial mass of around 10 to the power of 12 kg would be
completing its evaporation today |
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No no, it would have been a trillion kg when it was born
during the big bang. Most of that would have evaporated by
now - today it would be roughly big enough to pop into a
bathroom and held captive by antigravity clamps that
erm... were in turn affixed to something that didn't
automatically annihilate on contact with antimatter...
because... magic bathroom or something. |
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If I remember my figures correctly... if you've a black hole the mass of a good sized office tower, you can keep it from evaporating by feeding it 10 or so tons of ... well, whatever you like, I suppose... every second. |
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Very much the "camel through the eye of a needle", naturally. |
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Downside is - unless you're thinking space travel which is what the calcs were for - the 10 tonnes worth of gamma rays and assorted subatomic flotsam and jetsam coming out of it every second. Bear in mind that the juicy bits of atom bombs are measured in kilograms, not tonnes. |
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Black holes can have electrostatic charge, which means that if you feed them either electrons or positive ions you can polarize them and then manipulate them with simple electric or magnetic fields. |
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Nice. That's the fixings sorted then. So we take an old
black hole from the big bang, trap it with a few magnets
and pop it into the bathroom. The only issue left is those
pesky gamma rays. I suggest we build remote-controlled
peeing robots to go in there and do our peeing for us. |
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//urinal manufacturers unlikely to attempt it// |
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[kdf] your thinking is back-to-front. The Black Hole Starship will, if it is to carry humans, have urinals installed in it. Therefore, Black Hole Starship manufacturers will be extremely likely to also manufacture urinals. |
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The Black Hole Starship will create a massive Higgs Boson field ahead of itself, thus creating gravity without actual physical mass. |
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The Black Hole Urinal probably won't do that because - after the bosons disappear - you're stuck with very unhappy degenerate urine. |
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It's all about accessorizing. [link] |
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