h a l f b a k e r yGuitar Hero: 4'33"
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Baby Ring Tones
Save time and avoid confusion with a distinct signaling sound for your child | |
A cell phone allows you to select a unique ring tone so you can recognize it when youre in a room with other people who have cell phones. Why not apply the same principle to infants?
A device with a microphone attached to your baby's clothes detects when he or she makes a loud noise, and responds
by playing the opening notes of Purple Haze (or whatever sound you've chosen). Never again will you have to ask, "Is that my baby? Whose baby is that?" No more will every parent in the room reach for his or her offspring every time someone else's infant cries.
[link]
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---*Announcement Before A Movie*--- "As a reminder, no flash photography is allowed, and please turn off your baby." |
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Could be built into a humorous short advert where someone's baby starts ringing, and the baby is ejected out of the seat and flies into the screen {splat} |
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When I had a baby I found that (as I had been told) I was actually capable of differentiating my baby's cry from everyone else's. I'm still giving this a bun though, because of the staggering embarrasment it could have saved me from when I got it wrong on a couple of occasions. |
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A vibrating baby would be less annoying. |
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No two people cry alike in the Entire World. That includes grown-ups as well as children. I can recognize all my adult friends' cries instantly. |
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By contrast, many people's speaking voices are similar to each other's, and I often can't tell them apart. |
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So apparently, one purpose of crying is differentiation. This is strange, since crying is also a distress call and everyone can recognize it, even though each person's cry is different. |
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"Jeezus, honey, I've heard the first five notes to 'Smoke on the water' for over an hour now! Put the kidd-o to bed!" |
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