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If you accidentally walk into quicksand you are in a lot of trouble, unless you are wearing a pair of my new Anti Quicksand Trouser Gaiters.
The more you struggle, the more the quicksand will drag you down. Once you descend until the quicksand reaches your knees, you can no longer escape. It's at
this point you should activate your Anti Quicksand Trousers Gaiters. These consist of a pair of rubberised gaiters that are attached stylishly to the lower portion of the trouser legs and connected to a cylinder of compressed air and an activation button.
The compressed air is released by pressing the button, causing the lower portion of the trousers to explosively balloon outwards. The large extra void they create enables the quicksand captive to withdraw their legs from the grip of the dastardly mire.
Each pair of Anti Quicksand Trouser Gaiters comes with a collection of TV series and film clips where people being victims of quicksand is a major component in the story line.
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Annotation:
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A fool and his money are easily parted. |
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[+] ... assuming these are sold with a clever liability waiver, for the purposes of sending people head first into quicksand |
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I like how it does not come with instructions, but rather warnings. |
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Practically I think it may actually work. Balloons will have two sides by nature. If they are fairly friction free, they would allow escape, following a quick pop . In fact, even having deflated balloon pants may work, as long as the boot is flexible enough to let the foot come out. |
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I have read horror stories of people getting a foot stuck when the tide starts coming in. It happens. |
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