h a l f b a k e r yCompound disinterest.
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Take one large wheelbarrow and tip it downwards so that the handles are on the ground and the wheel is in the air. Sit inside with feet resting on the ground.
I did this last weekend after moving a large pile of outdoor things, and after cleaning the barrow and tilting it - i climbed in. Due to
the metal material of the object, it became a little uncomfortable after a while, but with the cocoon-like shape of the barrow i fitted snugly inside. With a padded interior lining, a wheelbarrow can be not only relaxing, but perfect for unexpected family gatherings when chairs are of short supply.
Sleeping aunts or relatives can then be quickly and quietly disposed of in local rivers or dams.
wheelbarrow tricks
http://www.wheelbarrowfreestyle.com
[benfrost, Oct 06 2004]
[link]
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It would need suspension to avoid waking up sleeping relatives when taking them to the disposal site (and why do you make the distinction between aunts and relatives? - unless of course your aunts are not your relatives. There may be more to this than I thought...). |
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for some reason my aunts often wake up during disposal - most of my relatives however, stay asleep long after I have driven them out and placed them next to the highway with a little pillow under their chins. |
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Buffy fell asleep in my barrow, and I hurried her to the river. Good, I thought, at last! At last! But damn, I forgot to remove her water wings. |
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Perhaps these could be used in beer gardens, instead of picnic tables, so as to ease with chucking out time. |
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Shopping carts are also good for disposals. Place the relative inside, telling him it’s a ride. Outside the Piggly Wiggly, push the cart to the top of the hill, turn, release, and watch the cart run straight and true to the river below. Yay! (Be sure not to pick a cart with a bad wheel, where it swerves into a parked car. It can be exhausting to pull that protesting relative up the hill several times!) And, if you get bored, you can make a train of carts, putting a relative in each! |
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This sounds relatively dangerous. |
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